Beware, children's party, or How to get trauma in the midst of fun
Caring parents happily and enthusiastically bring dressed up children with the best intentions - to entertain their child, give a little joy, magic, pamper slightly, arrange a surprise …
Waiting for the holiday is better than the holiday itself
A series of New Year holidays is approaching. Magic, gifts, decorations, a Christmas tree, Santa Claus with the Snow Maiden … Children learn rhymes and songs and all year long try to behave themselves in order to still receive a gift. Excerpts are enough for twenty minutes, but their efforts will not go unnoticed. Parents hide boxes in the corners and try not to forget where and when the next matinee is.
Many shopping malls, entertainment centers, children's institutions, taking advantage of the season, invite children to the New Year's holidays, so that they can spend their parents' money with pleasure and enthusiasm on this particular event. For the special attractiveness of the action, the organizers spare no money, no effort, no imagination - music, competitions, performances, animators, giant dolls, gifts, Santa Claus and so on and so forth. If only the fun was in full swing. Let's get louder, brighter, more fun. It's a holiday!
Caring parents with joy and enthusiasm bring dressed-up children with the best intentions - to entertain their child, give a little joy, magic, pamper a little, arrange a surprise.
Nobody wanted anything wrong
Assessing the situation through ourselves, through the prism of our own desires, habits and abilities, without taking into account the psychological characteristics of the child, we do not take into account such pitfalls of intense entertainment as potential risks for the child's psyche. Yuri Burlan at the training "System-vector psychology" clearly and reliably shows that it is absolutely safe and even useful to take children to any children's events without sound and visual vectors. These two groups, of course, should also not be deprived of the opportunity to attend a merry holiday, but only if certain conditions are met.
The period of childhood is a time when not only the physical body (the child's body) develops, but an intensive psychological development takes place. Just as a baby is not yet able to perfectly control his body, he is not yet able to psychologically adapt the pressure of the landscape, as adults do. Therefore, a situation in which it is simply unpleasant for you, as a parent, to be, for a child can become a real psychological trauma, over-stress.
Over time, in the process of growing up and developing, the child will certainly learn to adapt, keep stress, switch to the positive sides of the situation, and the like. But while he is small, such tests for his psyche can harm him and stop the development of innate psychological properties.
Knowledgeable means armed
A competent adult who has a command of systems thinking is able to make any holiday fun and joyful for any kid, or at least to minimize potential psychological risks. This is possible thanks to a deep understanding of the structure of the child's psyche, the mechanisms of its development and the characteristics of a particular small personality.
So what could be the danger?
A child with a sound vector has an auditory analyzer of special sensitivity. Therefore, too loud music, noise, screams can be felt by such a baby painfully, up to physical pain in the ears. Moreover, the noise level that a person without a sound vector perceives normally can be super strong for a small sonic. It is very difficult for parents who do not have a sound vector to understand through themselves what is happening with the child. His suffering can often be perceived as whims, fear, or deliberate self-indulgence. They try to stir up the kid, make him interested in participating in the holiday, attract him to the game, and when this does not give the expected result, they begin to scold, scold or even insult the child, accusing him of ingratitude, fastidiousness and detachment.
In this case, against the background of a feeling of painful noise level, tension of the auditory sensor, the child receives additional stress from the parents - insults and accusations against him cause even more damage to the development of the sound vector than noisy fun. Trying to get away from the surrounding reality, which is a source of suffering, the baby begins to withdraw, become more silent and less and less responsive to speech addressed to him. This is a kind of protection system, avoiding pain and at the same time stopping the development of the psyche of the sound engineer.
What is the danger of active festivities for children with a visual vector?
Little spectators simply adore any entertainment events, in addition, they will never miss their opportunity to speak in public or at least take part in competitions, games, performances. Violent imagination and imaginative thinking of the spectator are able to revive everything around - from favorite dolls to the most common objects. Emotional and sensitive, they live in their colorful world, which very easily collapses under the influence of the most dangerous feeling for spectators - fear.
A baby with a visual vector experiences both positive and negative emotions at the peak of their intensity, so fear for the viewer is not just fear, it is horror, panic, a nightmare in reality. In this regard, animator dolls in the form of wild animals, staging fairy tales with eating or killing like Kolobok, Little Red Riding Hood, Baba Yaga and the like can plunge an impressionable child into a real shock. The point is, he believes! Yes, he takes everything to heart, he transfers the image of the eaten kolobok to himself, experiencing all the sensations at peak amplitude. It was not some kolobok they ate, it was him, a little boy, who ate wild animals that walk around and wave their paws.
At such moments, to everything else, it occurs to parents to either laugh at an overly impressionable child, or even worse - to educate in the style of “don't be afraid, you're a man!”. To the state of inner terror in the baby is added the loss of the sense of security and safety that parents give. This is too much stress for the child, trapping him in a state of fear, hindering further development - the education of feelings for bestowal - in compassion, empathy, love for one's neighbor.
The already complex process of the development of the visual vector (a separate personal evolution of feelings from fear to love) stops at the lowest level of development, and with repeated episodes of fear, it generally stops. A big lover of horror films, ostentatious hysterics, a narcissistic narcissist who requires infinite attention to his person, is completely unable to share the feelings of another person, feel his pain or give someone his love, and this is when there is a potential opportunity to become a selfless physician, a social worker., the founder of a charitable foundation, an active public figure, culture or art worker.
Safe Childhood System
At Yuri Burlan's training "System-Vector Psychology", a special systemic thinking is formed, which makes it easy and absolutely natural to interact with any child. Without much effort, an understanding of potentially promising directions in its development comes, and a certain signaling system is created that accurately determines situations that may be dangerous for the baby.
The ability to look at the world through the eyes of your child gives an awareness of the extreme importance of a sense of security and safety, and understanding the individual characteristics of the psyche of a particular person forms the highest degree of trust and affinity between the souls of the parent and the child, which can become the basis for achieving the highest level of development of the innate psychological properties of the baby.
The key to the success of the development of our children today is in our hands. You can learn about the secrets of raising a happy generation at the next free online lectures on system-vector psychology.
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Thousands of people who underwent Yuri Burlan's training in systemic vector psychology were able to establish relationships with their children. You can find their reviews here: