My husband hates my mother: how to restore peace in the family?
In our time, we listen to few people, we want to decide for ourselves how we should live. How to initiate spiritual rapprochement with your husband if discord reigns in the relationship? The husband cannot stand his mother-in-law and is already openly rude to her. Everyone at home is between two fires. To establish sensual logistics in the family and to reconcile people close to you will help to reveal the deep background of their dislike.
"So that her feet are no longer here!"
The husband cannot stand his mother-in-law and is already openly rude to her. Everyone at home is between two fires. The training "System-Vector Psychology" by Yuri Burlan reveals: the most common cause of hostility between mother-in-law and son-in-law is failure to deliver emotions. To establish sensual logistics in the family and to reconcile the people close to you will help to reveal the deep background of their dislike.
Specify the addressee for the delivery of feelings
One feeling for two makes people the most dear to each other. And if your loved one did not throw out the trash, did not have time to see the child at the concert, forgot about your anniversary? What if he prefers to spend a few free minutes in the evening on "dances" and not on his wife? Yes, you never know reasons for indignation! Reproaches, grievances, plates, tears fly at him, or even just reproachful silence.
A woman does not always know how to talk about painful things with her husband so as not to quarrel completely, but to hear each other and understand. And somehow by itself it turns out that you go where they will pity you, where you can talk heart to heart about your troubles. Most often to my mother. A similar situation can be with a friend.
All night long, mom and daughter discuss how unlucky they are with their husband and son-in-law. They cry together, dream of how life could have turned out if “I was smarter then and chose a promising classmate”. And by morning, in my mother's kitchen, although it is sad and unbearably sorry for myself, it is warm in my soul that there is at least one person in the world who understands you.
We build connections with those with whom we are sincere and open. With whom we share important feelings, thoughts. Trust and intimacy grow in such a relationship. The catch is that we can only build a deep sensory connection with one person. We are emotionally monogamous. And instead of a husband, the mother remains the closest person to an adult woman.
And a woman comes to her husband emotionally devastated. This can be compared to how a man came to his wife after a night with his mistress. He has already realized his desire and is not burning with attraction to his wife. So a woman who has given her feelings to someone else comes to her husband without a desire to build a sensual connection with him, to be frank. On the contrary, she moves away from him. And the marital relationship begins to burst at the seams. After all, the guarantee of their stability, mutual love and attraction in the long run is precisely the emotional connection that a woman initiates.
The man feels that he is being deprived of the most important thing. He does not stand his mother-in-law with the same force with which his wife would hate her rival. The mother-in-law will cease to be an enemy only when the woman conserves her spiritual warmth only for her husband.
Replace the content of the emotional message
If a woman seethes only with claims, she herself becomes an unpleasant company for a man. How to cope with irritation and resentment towards him, in order to stop nagging and be able to share positive emotions?
In Soviet times, in family conflicts, parents did not take the side of their child. On the contrary, the mother-in-law supported her son-in-law, and the mother-in-law supported her daughter-in-law. This created positive tension and did not allow accusations to grow. Both husband and wife began to doubt their exclusive rightness and were ready to seek a compromise.
In our time, we listen to few people, we want to decide for ourselves how we should live. How to initiate spiritual rapprochement with your husband if discord reigns in the relationship? Get to know him better.
When, from the very first lectures of Yuri Burlan, the inner world of a loved one is revealed to you, your emotional mood changes dramatically. And this new understanding becomes the basis for solving any family troubles. You can experience the magic of this transformation for yourself already in free classes.
When we realize our innate difference at the training "System-vector psychology" by Yuri Burlan, we stop blaming a loved one for what he does not do, does not think, does not feel like we ourselves. We learn to discover the depth of another perception of reality. We learn to talk about the innermost and hear each other.
Understanding her beloved, a woman gives him a message to realize his real desires. And when a man harmoniously fits into society and receives approval and an incentive for further development from his beloved woman, he no longer projects his dislike on his loved ones. And already neither the mother-in-law, nor the neighbor, nor the colleague, nor the child will be able to bring out of the state of happiness a person who has a solid foundation - a woman who loves him and believes in him.
Everyone has their own privacy
In the realities of our mentality, parents of adult children often take an active part in their family life and help. The very need for this help signals the mother-in-law that something is wrong in her daughter's marriage and, of course, the son-in-law is to blame for this, in her opinion. As a result, the mother expects gratitude from her daughter for the constant salvation, the husband expects sincerity and support from his wife, the woman rushes between two close people. And there is not a single happy person in this triangle.
The triangle also works in the mirror version - husband, wife and mother-in-law. In this case, the husband discusses family problems with his mother and moves away from his wife.
The training helps to accurately share what needs to be shared with dear people so that the relationship grows stronger and does not fall apart. A woman acquires the skill of maintaining emotions for her husband, making her family an independent happy unit. And to give my mother gratitude for life and the joy of watching her grown up girl, who is able to build her own well-being.