Beware, Brawler
A crowd of onlookers gathers around. None of the listeners is able to stop this farce, none of them is able to prevent it. The listeners are completely stunned, struck by the unreality of what is happening. The concert can last fifteen to twenty minutes, until the arrival of the guards or police.
The degree of conflict of a person is determined by a number of factors.
People with different vectors are characterized by different tendencies to create conflict situations.
People with the Skin vector quickly light up like matches, quarrel over trifles, but at the same time they are very quick-witted and, after a couple of minutes after a violent conflict, behave as if nothing had happened.
People with the Anal vector never scandal, are distinguished by great patience, but they can be extremely stubborn, and, in the event of a conflict situation, they take offense for life, subsequently poisoning the life of the offender day after day with reproaches, a heavy look and verbal sadism.
It is quite difficult to bring people with a Muscle vector out of emotional balance.
But people with a visual vector are very vulnerable and can burst into tears from one sidelong, as they might have thought, look or one rude word heard from a completely random person on the street. Emotionally unstable people with a visual vector are so vulnerable that if they become a victim of a brawler with a skin vector, they experience it very hard, even to the point that they can get sick, and then explain what happened to those around them only with the "evil eye". After all, they do not understand the psychology of this phenomenon. It is interesting that people with a skin vector, who constantly provoke everyone and everything into a scandal, after the scandal look refreshed and invigorated.
It is quite understandable why there are two common points of view on this score. People who most often become victims of brawlers, as a rule, are prone to esoteric ideas about life and consider brawlers "energy vampires", trying to come up with a bunch of tips on how to neutralize the influence of such a vampire on themselves. Those who are distinguished by increased conflict, justify themselves, relying on supposedly scientific "psychological" articles, in which the scandal is described as a necessary psychological release, giving a certain energy boost to both participants in the scandal and contributing to the renewal and refreshment of relations.
The presence of this or that vector does not mean that a person is doomed to live according to a certain scenario, for example, to be a brawler just because he has a Skin vector. The decisive role is played by the state of the vectors, not their presence or absence.
The least conflicting people are with realized vectors. People with archetypically developed vectors are characterized by increased conflict intensity, as they try to make up for the shortfall in the realization of their natural essence at the expense of others. So, unrealized people with the skin vector scandal, with the anal vector - they are offended and verbally sadistic, with the visual - they throw tantrums with tears and emotional blackmail, with the oral - they swear as if they want to "verbally eat you alive" and so on. After completing the training in system-vector psychology, a person begins to understand himself, his desires, realizes all his innate potential and gets the opportunity to realize himself as much as possible in the group: new ideas, desires, opportunities appear, and there is no one left for scandals, tantrums, resentments, etc. strength, no desire.
But even if the vectors of interacting people are more or less developed, conflict situations may arise. They often appear where people with counter vectors interact. We are always annoyed by those who behave differently from us. Not understanding the natural essence of another person, we constantly provoke conflicts around us every day.
Having completed training in system-vector psychology, a person stops looking at others “through himself”, through the prism of only his life values. So, a person with a skin vector, for whom speed, accuracy and punctuality are important life values, is no longer annoyed with a person with an anal vector who is constantly late and does everything slowly. And a person with an anal vector, for whom order and a clear sequence in everything are of great importance, is no longer irritated by a sloppy, from his point of view, a person with a skin vector who always jumps from one to another, not finishing what he started. People with different vectors have completely different behavior patterns. For example, a person with an anal and a person with a skin vector will do the same job differently. The anal will take a long timebut qualitatively, which is called "for ages", and the leather man - "fast, cheap and cheerful."
A conflict situation in teams is often created by incorrect ranking in relationships. It is dangerous to demote a person with a urethral vector. If such a person is ordered something in a special way or even praised "from the bottom up", thereby lowering him in rank, you can provoke a urethral outburst of anger. A person with a skin vector in an undeveloped state, which means with heightened ambitions, will in every possible way strive for petty power, provoking conflict situations. Incorrect ranking in men with a skin vector is most often expressed in attempts to raise their rank at the expense of those below them. Systems thinking provides a universal knowledge of how to rank correctly in any group. This not only harmonizes the microclimate in the team, but is also the key to the prosperity and productivity of group work. Company,in which the ranking rules are strictly observed, is always an order of magnitude more successful.
At the training on systems thinking, conflict is considered as fully and comprehensively as possible, the deep reasons underlying the conflict in each of the vectors, depending on its state, are revealed. The knowledge gained at the training allows not only to prevent the emergence of conflicts, but also to accurately identify people with a predisposition to create conflict situations, neutralizing their impact on themselves.
The most conflicting in relationships are people with the skin vector, since the skin vector is contradictory to all vectors, and in combination with the oral vector, the unrealized skin vector gives the most dangerous condition for others - the querulant complex.
The increased conflict nature of the skin vector is associated with its natural prohibitive and restrictive function. Skin limitation has two directions: towards itself and towards the object outside. In childhood, the development of our properties is directed at ourselves, after puberty we direct our properties to the outside world. If, in the pre-pubertal period, a person with a skin vector learns to limit himself and enjoy self-restraint, then he develops such qualities as restraint, self-discipline, responsibility. After puberty, skin restriction inward becomes secondary and serves to maintain the "functionality" of the skin essence: adherence to a strict daily regimen, compulsory gymnastics in the morning, accuracy in time, and so on. Accustomed to self-restraint, demanding of himself, a person with a skin vector limits us rationally,and therefore, although we feel tension inside ourselves (few people like it when they are limited in something, something is forbidden: “no!”, “no!”), we submit to it. In fact, we obey a person who follows the requirements put forward within himself.
A scandal arises when a skin person who has not learned to subjugate himself, that is, a person who grew up without self-discipline, tries to subjugate us. We unconsciously feel that he is not capable of self-restraint within himself, we receive a signal about the non-realization of his vector, and, accordingly, we react with insubordination. In response to this, an undeveloped skinhead increases the pressure on us and moves from an adequate prohibition and restriction to an inadequate prohibition and restriction, going beyond the scope of normal behavior.
In combination with the oral vector, an undeveloped and unrealized cutaneous vector can form a querulant complex (pathological brawler).
The skin vector, constantly trying to limit the external world, but without achieving visible results, enters a state of stress and uses the oral vector, which has not been sufficiently implemented in order to reverse the situation. Speaking becomes one constant verbal scandal with the outside world. If the cutaneous vector is in a "full-fledged" neurosis, and the oral vector is also unrealized, then the querulant content is fixed by a positive emotional release. In this case, we get a “full-fledged” neurotic querulant complex. Thanks to the over-extroversion of the oral vector, supported by cutaneous extraversion in a certain state, these people are able to hook anyone with a word.
Such people can come to the store and start scandalous out of the blue. You can observe a similar dialogue:
Querulant: Show me that hat!
Saleswoman: Yes, now, one minute.
Querulant: Who did you call an idiot?
And off we go. A crowd of onlookers gathers around, everyone judges the situation through their vectors. The Kozhnik thinks that this person has been robbed, the analnyk is sure that something strange has happened: in fact, a person cannot yell like that out of nowhere? None of the listeners is able to stop this farce, the man brawler will stop at nothing, none of them is able to stop him. The listeners are completely stunned, struck by the unreality of what is happening. The concert can last fifteen to twenty minutes, until the arrival of the guards or police. At the sight of them, as well as at the threat of sending the querulant to the clinic for the insane, the instigator of the turmoil instantly dissolves into the crowd. In the shop on the next street, the situation repeats itself …
An unrealized person always looks bad. And the neurotic always looks terrible! A realized oralist is not a chatterbox, but a talented orator. With his voice, which one cannot but listen to, he unites the masses. An example of this is television, where oral and visual specialists work almost exclusively. A person in his place looks satisfied, satisfied with himself and others.
How to properly educate your child so that in the future he never has a need to make trouble? What if the brawler is one of your family members or your work colleague? How to identify a potential brawler in public places, neutralize its impact and not become its victim? How to deal with brawlers if you are not already lucky enough to face one? You will hear answers to these and other questions at our psychological training!
