My mother-in-law's borscht tastes better, but I don't want to be a victim
If you are married to a sadist, then it will only get worse. First, he tugs at his hand, this characteristic gesture of men with an anal vector is usually followed by blows to the back and the back of the head. He will not calm down, because it’s not you, but his personal dissatisfaction and grievances …
No more strength to be a victim? According to your husband, you are a worthless mistress, an ugly woman, a bad mother. He humiliates, pulls your hand. Maybe from his blows you flew around the apartment? She wriggled as she tried to free herself from the suffocating grip.
Something went wrong? When he first met, he didn't treat you like you were a free washing machine app. He was so caring: he would pour tea, wrap his legs with a rug. You fell in love, flew with happiness. And now…
At first he beat with words. You learned that you cook borscht worse than his mother, your hands grow out of the wrong place, and you behave like a fallen woman. After a quarrel, he slammed the door and went to his friends. You stayed at home and cried. I frantically tried to guess what your next mistake was and how to earn forgiveness.
Where did the tyrant come from in your beloved man?
Only a man with an anal vector in a state of severe frustration can be a domestic tyrant. His adherence to patriarchal values can acquire a perverse character if the psyche of such a person is traumatized or is in deep resentment against his mother, women, and the whole world. Then a woman in a relationship with him feels not like a stone wall, but like a fortress.
This man seeks to subdue a woman and suppress her will, it is important for him to feel himself the master in his own house. For millennia, men with such a psyche have succeeded. Gone are the days when the status of women in the family was slightly higher than that of livestock.
But humanity is developing, and a modern woman studies and works no worse than a man. Women no longer want to be limited by their children and home, they actively participate in social life and massively go out of control! For men with an anal vector with sadistic inclinations, this is stressful! In such conditions, they increasingly want to point out to the "woman" that her place is in the kitchen, and fists are often used as an argument.
If you are married to a sadist, then it will only get worse. First, he tugs at his hand, this characteristic gesture of men with an anal vector is usually followed by blows to the back and the back of the head. He will not calm down, because it’s not you, but his personal dissatisfaction and grievances.
Whatever you do, it will not be as it should be for him. He will put forward new demands, correct even work that is close to perfection, and voluptuously enjoy watching your torment. Cleaned up a two-story house? Are you waiting for him to be pleased? Not so, because you left three specks of dust on the table in the living room. It is impossible to please him.
It can be scary to stop, especially if there are children and financial dependence on the tyrant, but it is important to understand that by staying with him, a woman does not receive what, in fact, remains with him - security and safety for herself and children.
If you decide to leave, then it is very important to understand how to do it.
The fact is that, by nature, it is important for men with an anal vector to complete everything they undertake - to the end, to the point. If a woman suddenly breaks off a relationship on her own initiative, then she can provoke such a man into revenge or long persecution. When a marriage breaks down, such a man can take the children and turn them against the mother.
If a woman in the heat of the moment decides to run away from her husband after another scandal, abandoning everything, capturing only a passport, a man with an anal vector experiences severe discomfort: he could not subdue the woman, stopped feeling like a master, could not say the last word in the conflict - psychologically put an end to the relationship … In this case, the woman may be persecuted after the divorce.
Since Russia does not yet have a law on domestic violence that would effectively protect a woman from the tyrant's aggression, it is important for her to take care of herself. This can be done by understanding the psyche of the sadist.
The fact is that it is especially important for him that everything is equal. It reaches the point of absurdity. If his friend's wallet is stolen, then he can easily pass the verdict: “The criminal is guilty, but you are good too: why did you run around the dark gateways at night? Too blame! This assessment of events gives him an unaccountable feeling of psychological comfort - equally.
This feature can be used in order to protect yourself and children from the encroachments of the abuser. It's worth stepping on your own song's throat and saying something like, “You know, I was wrong. Your mother told the truth - you will not see happiness with me. You really deserve the best. It is important here to remember all the good things that were in your relationship and acknowledge it. This will give him the feeling that he is still the master of the situation, and will help him to let go without intimidation. You will enter a new life without fear that they will watch you at the entrance, and without annoying SMS messages with threats from your ex. Freedom and security are possible.
Read stories of women who have found the strength to get away from a domestic aggressor. And thanks to Yuri Burlan's training "System Vector Psychology", they were able to change their lives easily and without loss:
