Had to be in time for mom. Inspired by K. Paustovsky's "Telegram"
When we see that the elderly in our society live poorly, we automatically try it on ourselves. And with horror we think about retirement - how to survive when nobody needs you? A dead-end way of thinking and acting is emerging for the development of society: why invest in a society that will not need you later? And where there is no me - even a flood.
She's been waiting for you since you left.
She fed the old age dog with memory.
She prayed that you would find the
Way to the house where she stayed …
Andrey Lysikov (Dolphin)
The bustle of the big city. Lots of things to do. Not a minute free. And if there is a moment of respite, then you want to spend it on something positive. You slide along the news feed in social networks, eating with your eyes the jokes of the day, photos of kittens, the first snow, friends' dinners, and then suddenly:
She has a daughter in Leningrad, yes, apparently, she flew high … The last time she came three years ago.
When was the last time I was with my mother? What hurts her again has disappeared from her head. Parents do not fit in our lives, strapped by a lack of time.
We live in the cutaneous phase of human development. We run, strive for success, climb the career ladder, save up for a car-apartment-vacation, minimize the waste of time with technology.
Contact with a person is determined by his potential value as "our", if necessary. But with those who a priori their own - parents - sometimes we stop talking altogether. Not knowing that in keeping in touch with them, speaking in a skinny way, there is a colossal benefit for the soul.
Caring for Parents - Human Test
My beloved, I will not survive this winter. Come just for a day. Let me have a look at you. Hold your hands.
Respect for parents, says Yuri Burlan's System-Vector Psychology, is a human necessity. But often we slide back into the wild savannah, even in modern metropolitan areas. There, where only natural laws of communication operate: from parents to children, that is, animal instinct. But the connection from children to parents, that is, the human superstructure, built up over the years of cultural development, often does not withstand stress.
It seems to us that we can cope without it. We don’t call, we don’t come, we don’t worry, we don’t care - we are busy earning money on Rolls-Royce. But from time to time he scratches his soul so that even the statue of Gogol seems to drill a reproachful glance for neglecting his mother's letter.
Or maybe it's not about employment. And this is our principled position. We don't owe them anything! They yelled at me, forced me, humiliated me! My feet will no longer be in this house. I have not received anything normal from them in my life, and they will not wait.
From old age, she forgot that this money was not at all what Nastya had in her hands, and it seemed to her that the money smelled of Nastya's perfume.
According to our set of vectors, we relate to our parents differently. The owners of the anal vector are ideally able to experience a deep sense of gratitude, if not for the burden of resentment. Owners of the skin - a sense of duty, if not for the lack of time and funds for their own plans. Spectators are emotionally attached to loved ones, unless, of course, this connection is interrupted, and the flow of love is not directed only in their own direction.
Now all kinds of these connections are junk because of our misunderstanding of ourselves. Only occasionally does a skinny sense of duty to our parents force us to send a money order. But in these pieces of paper, mom wants to feel the care that cannot be sent by the most advanced technologies.
Separation instead of unity
Man is a social form of life. Our achievements and discoveries came about only through interaction with each other. Without preserving the integrity of the community, we lose our humanity. And how can we create integrity if we break the most natural ties? System-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan explains: when we take care of the elderly, we preserve our future, our society, the human species as a whole.
Animal law is the preservation of your life, your piece of flesh. Human law is the preservation of a social form of life in connection with other people.
More includes less. So it is here: we strive to preserve our body, like all living things, but for people this is not enough. Adequate connections with other people are necessary for a fulfilling life. Hatred and reproaches, of course, are not.
You can start building connections small, with close ones - with mom and dad. But we are overwhelmed by resentments and rationalizations, through which we cannot cross without understanding the structure of the psyche and the general laws of the development of the species.
According to the system-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan, by supporting our parents, giving them material and psychological comfort, we fulfill the unwritten law of human nature. You can, of course, put our horns on and continue to assert that we do not owe them anything. But this duty is not even so much in relation to parents as in relation to the entire human species, without the well-being of which our personal "everything is ok" is very fragile.
Ever since the man slammed the door of his parents' house, since he decided that he would never say a word to the hated father, for some reason an unbearable weight settled inside. It is possible to relieve the burden from the soul and improve relations with parents.
A collective sense of safety and security
The lack of human ties from children to parents leads not only to destruction within one family, within one person, it provokes a violation of the law of preservation of the species. The chain is simple. We do not live alone in the woods (with rare exceptions), we prefer to cluster in cities, in the state. You cannot survive one by one - the ancients understood this, but we suddenly became unaware.
Society is built on a collective sense of security and safety, says Yuri Burlan's system-vector psychology. The possibilities of society to develop depend on whether there is this feeling. When we are worried, only so that the “embittered environment” does not bite off our finger, we cannot think about something big, global, socially significant. Only his finger bothers.
When we see that the elderly in our society live poorly, we automatically try it on ourselves. And with horror we think about retirement - how to survive when nobody needs you? A dead-end way of thinking and acting is emerging for the development of society: why invest in a society that will not need you later? And where there is no me - even a flood. But the deluge of the disintegration of society cannot be selective. And if it happens, the wave will blow away all well-settled ones.
Respect for parents, their alimony and support - this is the law of the preservation of the human species. This is the key to the evolution of the human psyche. There can be no involution in the development of a species. There can be delays that bring tremendous suffering to the species in general and the persistent in particular. As a result, we cannot take place in society if, with living parents, we have no connection with them.
If there is no sense of collective security and safety, society is dying and then dies. When the old and the weak are not protected, a hole in the public safety system is created.
When a society observes alimentary old age, it feels psychological comfort and confidence. Only then do we acquire the ability to perform some actions not only in order to earn money for our old age, but in order to move something for the better for the common good.
Caring for parents is a guarantee of mental comfort
After all, I have no one in my life. No, and will not be dearer. Just to be in time.
It doesn't matter how much we were disliked, it doesn't matter how we were offended, humiliated and misunderstood. You cannot afford to be late "for hundreds of necessary words, for the views of a thousand, for a million moments."
To cope with a lump of resentments and a pathological lack of time for parents, to find points of emotional contact, to feel the full depth of gratitude for their gift to you in the form of life will help Yuri Burlan's training in system-vector psychology.
To catch up with your mom, register for a free online training right now using the link.
