How can I forget the girl who took my heart?
Over and over I think about her. I am haunted by the thought that if I did something differently, everything would turn out differently for us. Maybe I made a mistake somewhere, but I can't figure out which one. Why did she leave? What did she miss next to me? These thoughts are driving me crazy. How to forget the girl you love?
I remember every moment I spent with her. I remember her lively laugh, her smile. I remember our long, interesting conversations. And when I remember her, it seems to me that we are still connected so much, even though we parted. These memories are all I have. And they make me suffer and suffer every day. How can I forget the girl who was my dream come true?
I lost everything with her
When she left, it was the end. My whole life collapsed before our eyes. Everything has lost its meaning. I realized that I really didn't need anything except to wake up next to her and look into her eyes. Why should I live when she's gone?
Over and over I think about her. I am haunted by the thought that if I did something differently, everything would turn out differently for us. Maybe I made a mistake somewhere, but I can't figure out which one. Why did she leave? What did she miss next to me? These thoughts are driving me crazy. How to forget the girl you love?
The training "System-vector psychology" by Yuri Burlan will help you to understand your feelings and see the situation differently.
Breaking Up: When Time Doesn't Heal Wounds
Parting is always difficult, because falling in love, everyone thinks that this is for a long time, that this is forever. Getting to know our partner more and more, including him in our life, spending time together, discussing everything in the world, we build an emotional connection. This is the foundation of a relationship. And when this emotional connection is broken, we seem to lose, together with the loved one, a piece of ourselves. After all, all the time that we were together, we dreamed, made plans. And now the relationship is gone. How to look into the future now? What can you see there when the very word "future" was associated with a loved one and no one else. And now it has collapsed, and you have to start life anew.
It is especially difficult to endure the rupture of the emotional connection for people with the anal-visual ligament of vectors. It is they who are endowed with the ability to feel deeply and strongly; moreover, they are the ones who are strong in their affections. A guy with an anal vector, once falling in love, is able to be faithful to his beloved to the end, and if the relationship does not work out, he will be tormented by the question of how to forget his beloved girl.
He is so arranged that he remembers everything that happened. He has an excellent memory and past value. This is why he can literally get stuck in the past. Everything around him reminds him of this relationship: they listened to this music together, went to these places, but a girl in a similar dress walked down the street, but, of course, not her …
In memory, he constantly returns to this traumatic situation of a breakup for him - there he is looking for an answer to his question: why did this happen? And he will not be able to get out of the past relationship until he finds all the answers.
In these past relationships, a man can keep:
- emotional dependence;
- guilt;
- resentment;
- feeling of incomplete relationship.
1) How to forget your ex when there is an emotional addiction
It happens that a feeling for a girl occupies all thoughts, fills your whole life. You are looking for an opportunity to be as close to her as possible, to see each other more often, to communicate. You come to life only in her presence. You need her like the sun. And without her you cannot imagine your life.
However, this attachment to one person can take on an unhealthy form of emotional dependence. You literally depend on her, on how she looked at you, what she said. All the time you are afraid, what if something goes wrong? Afraid of losing her.
And when fear appears, love leaves and addiction begins. After all, love is the freedom to give your feelings absolutely disinterestedly, without demanding the assessment of another person, without demanding anything in return. It means taking care of your beloved, genuinely interested in her life, doing something good for her. This kind of giving brings joy. And if this does not happen, then there is a problem.
But if the relationship has already ended, and you still only think about her? In such a situation, the psychologist can give advice to switch to something else and devote less time to these thoughts. But how can you follow this advice when these thoughts themselves arise in your head? It's like forbidding you to breathe. Only understanding the situation will help change this addicted relationship.
You can read more about emotional dependence in the article “I can't live without you. Reasons for love addiction."
2) I can't forget the girl. What have I done wrong?
A man with an anal vector strives to be the best in everything. It is always important for him to be on top. He values honesty, openness and loyalty. And if the relationship collapses, such a person may be inclined to self-criticism. It may seem to him that it is he who is to blame for everything. That if he did otherwise, everything could be changed. Only here is where he made a mistake - he cannot understand, because he always tries to be the best. He is the most reliable, most loyal guy. Stuck in this feeling of guilt and resentment at the same time, he cannot move on.
The training "System-vector psychology" makes it possible to understand where these experiences come from, what internal mechanism triggers them. A person with an anal vector begins to feel guilty when it seems to him that he put in not enough effort, did not do something that he could do, was not good enough. However, feelings of guilt can be a good motivation to look at your life differently, to do something important, to show that you can, what you are capable of. For example, finding a good job rather than sitting on the couch. Or go in for sports when I put it off for a long time. Gather the courage and have a heart-to-heart talk with the girl. When you take action that allows you to be better, you will begin to let go of getting stuck in bad states caused by guilt.
In addition, at the training "System-Vector Psychology" you will understand what your girlfriend wants from a relationship, what she expects from you and how to bring joy to her in order to make amends, if any. Yuri Burlan at the training shows that people with opposite qualities, completely different in their mental makeup, are attracted to a couple. On the one hand, the fact that you are different makes the relationship more stable, helps to maintain interest in each other. On the other hand, this leads to a misunderstanding of each other.
For example, a woman with a cutaneous-visual ligament of vectors may think that an anal-visual man is too slow, she is waiting for him to take the initiative and take on some business. And a man with an anal-visual ligament of vectors is simply in different rhythms - he is detailed, it is difficult for him to start a new one, and he may not even know what the woman wants from him, if she does not directly say about it.
By understanding each other's characteristics, you can completely reconsider your view of your partner and rebuild the relationship!
3) I can't forget my ex-girlfriend: how could she do this?
Another problem that pulls back into the past is resentment and inability to forgive. You feel that she was unfair to you. Of course, everyone has their flaws, but this is not a reason to leave! And you are terribly offended that she left you. You loved her so much, cared so much about her, appreciated every minute spent next to her! And she did not take care of your love, did not value your relationship. She betrayed the bright feeling that was between you. How can this be forgiven? And how to forget a wife who left after 20 years of marriage?
In fact, it is for a man with an anal vector that justice is important in everything, which he understands as - "everything should be equal." And if this justice is violated, an insult arises: I gave her so much, I loved her so much, but she left. By the way, guilt has the same root, just the opposite.
Both of these states level out when you begin to understand what drove the girl in this relationship, what feelings she felt, what thoughts guided her, and what drives you - to be aware of your particular perceptions. This is possible at the training "System-vector psychology". And then, instead of resentment and guilt, you will feel immense gratitude to your woman for the fact that this relationship was. Of course, you will not be able to forget them, but your memories will acquire shades of light sadness and light sadness, and not excruciating melancholy and heavy dependence.
4) Incomplete relationship: how to forget your ex?
The relationship came to naught, but it seems that some kind of understatement still remains between you: unspoken thoughts, unspoken feelings, unlived emotions. Something that sits deep inside and makes you re-experience moments of intimacy with this woman again and again. It can also be sexual addiction, because a man with an anal vector becomes very attached to his partner. Or maybe just a feeling of incompleteness of the relationship that flies in the air, and it seems that one spark will be enough to return everything. And you still vaguely hope so.
It is important for a person with an anal vector to bring any business to the end. And if this is the end of the relationship, then it should be a serious conversation and full understanding that there is no turning back. Otherwise, the person does not let go of the feeling that everything is still not final, that everything will still be, that everything can still return.
How to understand whether it is worth hoping for something or the relationship cannot be saved? Such an understanding is provided by the training "System-Vector Psychology" by Yuri Burlan - you yourself can realize the future of your relationship and find the right answer for you to the question of how to forget the ex-girlfriend you love.
Many couples rethought their relationships after the training. Some managed to save their marriage, while others were able to get rid of emotional dependence, resentment and feelings of guilt and start new relationships.
Do you want to know how to forget your girlfriend after breaking up and start enjoying life? Come to the training "System Vector Psychology" by Yuri Burlan.
