How to get over a breakup with a loved one
Parting with a loved one is one of the most traumatic events for people with a visual vector. It seems that at the same time, the only one - all meaning leaves life. After all, visual people actually comprehend their life in love: eternal and beautiful. And no one has such a force of emotional attachment to a partner, like a spectator. The breaking of this sensual connection gives rise to severe pain. How to deal with it?
How to deal with parting with someone you love with all your heart? Unbearable longing and pain. Tears flow like rivers, they cannot be stopped. And sometimes the pain becomes a tight lump in the throat - and does not allow a single tear to shed. And this makes it even worse - even like a wolf howl. What to do, how to get out of this state?
The answers to any, the most difficult question about relationships are in system-vector psychology. She will tell you how to get over the separation from your loved one and return to normal life. And it will give a real chance to return your partner if your relationship still has a prospect.
Unbearable pain: what to do?
The most difficult part of parting is for those of us who from birth have a special emotionality and sensuality. These are carriers of the visual vector. Their emotional range is huge: no one else is capable of experiencing such a euphoria of happiness, or falling into such an abyss of melancholy.
Parting with a loved one is one of the most traumatic events for such people. It seems that at the same time, the only one - all meaning leaves life. After all, visual people actually comprehend their life in love: eternal and beautiful. And no one has such a force of emotional attachment to a partner, like a spectator. The breaking of this sensual connection and gives rise to severe pain. How to deal with it?
- In an attempt to relieve acute stress, the visual person uses the natural desire for beauty. Unconsciously feeling our nature, we try to distract ourselves by buying stylish clothes, going to a beauty salon. Or, wanting to change the picture, we leave for a trip. Some of us who have never drawn before, have not taken photographs - find a sudden comfort in creativity. But enjoying color and shape only brings temporary relief. It does not solve the problem, does not give an answer to the question of how to part with a loved one and not burn out, not to long for forever, how to live after parting, how to make the pain recede forever.
- A more effective way to cope with parting with a loved one is to emotionally switch to other people. The very essence of the visual vector is the establishment of sensory connections. And not necessarily in a pair relationship. You've probably noticed that when you switch over and empathize with someone close to you, your own pain recedes and becomes less. You can find an interlocutor from the immediate environment or the Internet. We need new people, new emotional connections with them, new life stories, each of which is unique in its own way.
- When we are in pain, we feel the suffering of others much more sharply. Oddly enough, it is this turning point in life that can truly change your destiny for the better. After all, the huge sensory range of the owner of the visual vector is designed not only for love relationships in a couple or empathy for loved ones. This is an invaluable gift that can be realized for the benefit of many. Perhaps you have thought that there is so much pain in this world, and you wanted to do at least something to make it less?
Then everything is in your hands. You can take part in a charitable project, help orphans, old people or disabled people. An inspiring example is Konstantin Khabensky, a deeply feeling person with a visual vector. He managed to survive the pain of his wife's death by helping children with cancer. Today his foundation is hundreds of lives saved.
Sincere empathy, compassion and selfless help to others works the same for women and men with a visual vector who are in pain from parting with their beloved. And such a level of realization in the visual vector often brings an amazing "side effect": pair relations are improving by themselves. The fact is that by giving feelings to the one who needs them, to the one who cannot “repay” us, return them back, we learn to feel differently, become more sensitive, more delicate. We learn not to wait for anything in return for our care and our love, but simply to love. This changes our emotional relationships with others, with loved ones, including our relationship with a partner. Everyone will respond to a disinterested light feeling!
How to cope with parting with a loved one: tips for those who do not think "replacements"
But how to survive parting with a girl or boyfriend, if even in thoughts it is impossible to imagine another in his place? If the change of partners is deeply disgusting and you want forever "with only one and to the grave?"
Such swan loyalty, the desire to create a strong family and live together until gray hair with one partner are the natural values of the owners of the anal vector. They are given a special talent - phenomenal memory. On the one hand, it is an excellent quality that allows a person to become a teacher, scientist, analyst. However, in a stressful situation - after parting with a loved one - it is not clear how to continue living with such a memory. She keeps all the details of your meetings and conversations down to the details.
It is the owners of the anal vector who often look for advice on how to distract themselves from thoughts about their loved one. Memories experienced are scrolled in memory over and over again. They are plagued by questions about who was right and who was wrong. This can be very painful, especially when it is obvious that the relationship will no longer be restored.
Also, the owners of the anal vector often suffer from resentment against their partner and become hostages of their bad experience. They tend to generalize and transfer this experience to everyone else: "All men are good …, all women are sending …". Because of this, it is not possible to build new successful relationships.
In addition, the owners of the anal vector are by nature conservative, for them the past is of particular value. And even if there are no accusations against the partner or resentment against him, then another "bias" develops. It seems that "the way it was with this partner" - it will never be so with anyone. And time after time to start some kind of intrigue is just disgusting. After all, purity in relationships and loyalty are a priority.
Usually, carriers of such properties are looking for competent, scientifically based advice from a psychologist - how to part with a man or woman and still start life from scratch. System-vector psychology gives unmistakable answers:
- In a situation of acute stress, women with an anal vector partially relieve it when they clean and wash everything in their beloved home. So "at a short distance" you can clean up the rubble on the balcony, in the closet or cellar. To polish dishes and even a chandelier to which hands have not reached for a long time. Thanks to such pleasure from purity and the process of purification itself, there is a feeling that even in the head and soul it becomes brighter and cleaner. The main thing is to understand that this is a temporary measure and it brings only a partial result in how to survive parting with a man without loss.
- Men with an anal vector relieve some of their stress by taking apart parts in the garage, laying out tools on shelves, doing repairs. And for such a person, faithful and old friendship is no less important than a relationship in a couple. Therefore, you can distract yourself by gathering with old friends in a bathhouse or fishing. But all these are the same temporary measures as cleaning for women. More effective remedies are needed to truly overcome breakups.
- In order to truly resolve the question of how to survive parting with a beloved man or woman, it is necessary that the natural talents of the owner of the anal vector are used as intended. For example, memory. She can become your "executioner", endlessly scrolling through the details of an outdated relationship. But you can switch it to what it was created for: to accumulate and transmit information. For example, if you have wanted to master some knowledge for a long time, but have postponed - do it now. Sign up for any course where you need to learn new information. If at the same time you already have experience in teaching or research work - great. You will be able not only to receive, but also to transmit new information to others. This approach will relieve you of intrusive memories.
- Family and children are the basic values of the carriers of the anal vector. And if so - it's time to understand in detail how and on what you can build a truly strong family. How to lay the foundation for future happiness to avoid mistakes and bad experiences in the future. Find out the exact reasons why the relationship did not work out the last time, and how to behave so that the situation does not repeat itself.
This knowledge in its entirety is given by Yuri Burlan at the training "System-vector psychology".
Why relationships do not go well in a couple
When people are looking for advice from a psychologist on how to survive if a guy or a girl left, then very often psychologists are asked the following question: "Why did he do this to me?" or "How could she behave like that to me?" That is, it is obvious that we do not understand the thoughts and actions of our partner. Sometimes even people who have lived together for many years ask questions: “How can I survive the separation from my husband if he betrayed me after so many years? I never could have imagined that he was capable of such an act!"
This misunderstanding comes from the fact that we are trying to judge other people "through ourselves." The only thing that really comes to our minds is how we ourselves could behave in a similar situation. But by nature, people with completely different psychological properties are attracted to a couple.
For example, an unhurried and thorough, honest and loyal owner of the anal vector often gets an ambitious, agile, change-prone carrier of the skin vector. She is a homebody, and wonders: “Why does he not want to sit by the family hearth every evening? Are career and money more important than family happiness? " On this basis, conflicts or contradictions gradually grow.
A sensual, emotional spectator is drawn to a man with a sound vector. And he is naturally low-emotional, silent, immersed in himself. Many scandals were born on this basis: “Why is he so cold with me? Stop loving? Found another one?"
In order to understand exactly what exactly a person is guided by in his behavior, you need to know the structure of his psyche. This helps to reveal all the motives of his actions, to understand exactly what can be expected from him, and what there is no point in even hoping for.
Once you learn to see the other person for who they are, there will be no more questions about how to get over the separation from your lover or husband, girlfriend or wife. You will know exactly all the reasons why the relationship fell apart. This allows you to fully recover and gain the strength to live again, even after the most difficult parting:
There are also a lot of results about how we managed to save even a completely hopeless relationship. And not just save them, but bring them to a completely different level of mutual understanding and happiness:
Perhaps this could be your case too? Try to find out for sure already at the free online training "System Vector Psychology" by Yuri Burlan.