Sound Child Socialization: Between Develop and Harm
Making a decision to transfer a child to home education, and subsequently education, parents deprive him of the most important process - primary socialization. In children's collectives, along with education and training, the first ranking takes place, an early social structure is formed, where each takes his place according to the specific role. The ability to exist in a team, to live among one's peers is formed from the age of three, and the earlier this happens, the easier it is for the child later.
Noise is painful for the child
The first day in the kindergarten …
- Mom, they scream all the time! I won't go there again. My ears hurt.
- Bunny, well, shout with them too, it's fun.
A look full of amazement and somewhere even disbelief.
- No, this is not fun for me.
Every day spent in the kindergarten, the child becomes more and more withdrawn into himself. Instead of making new friends, he sits alone in a corner. Does not make contact, refuses group games and activities. He is ready to be alone at home with pleasure, just not to go to the garden. And after a few days at home, there is a noticeable improvement. The kid feels better, goes for a walk with pleasure, plays, contacts with children.
What happens to the child? What is the reason for this reaction to noise? How to help a child in a stressful situation? Perhaps he is still small for the garden and it is better for him to stay at home?
What if this is some kind of manipulation of parental love? If he just wants to be pampered, pitied and followed by him? Maybe not everything is as bad in the team as it seems?
Or maybe the child has a communication problem? Perhaps these are the first signs, and is it worthwhile to turn to specialists in time to correct the behavior?
The answers to these questions lie in the peculiarities of the child's psyche, namely, in the properties of the sound vector.
When the landscape weighs on your ear
System-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan explains this behavior of the child by the lack of the ability to adapt sound stress. However, this skill can and should be developed. The main thing in this issue is to approach the matter systematically and find an exact balance between "develop" and "harm".
A child's auditory sensor with a sound vector is a hypersensitive instrument for which loud noise or screaming can be too strong a stimulus causing a stress response.
Why doesn't this happen in adults?
Because the adult audio professional has already learned how to adapt to noise, although being in a super-noisy environment for an audio professional in balanced states is never pleasant.
The child is just beginning his path of development of the sound vector, and, of course, manifests himself directly - in the case of a large sound load, he “leaves” the painful environment by immersion in himself.
Of course, in a stressful situation, a small sound person is not able to actively make contact, make friends or perform any tasks. In addition, such a child, due to his psychological characteristics, does not immediately respond to speech addressed to him, and with a noise load, it will be even more difficult to build a communication bridge.
The properties of the sound vector are manifested by the child's introverted behavior, he is constantly in his world, continuing the internal dialogue, sorting through the chain of his thoughts. For this reason, the erroneous impression of a certain lethargy is often created, lagging behind other, more active and nimble children.
In order to respond to the speech addressed to the child, to answer the question, the sound engineer needs to get out of his own thoughts and create a communicative connection, transfer the focus of attention from the inside to the outside, which can take a few seconds. This is also related to the habit of the little sound engineer constantly asking again: "Huh?", "What?", Despite the fact that he hears better than anyone else.
In addition, it is not at all necessary for a sound child to look in the eyes or even in the direction of the person speaking to him in order to hear and understand him. Such a rule of behavior is instilled in him over time in the process of cultural education.
A quiet, unemotional sound person against the background of active talkative visual children seems strange, even detached. And all attempts to cheer him up, stir up or interest him in the game lead to even greater alienation.
There are times when it is sound children who are mistakenly labeled as "developmental delay" or "autistic behavior", right up to the diagnosis of autism and its intensive treatment. Many listeners of Yuri Burlan's training in systemic vector psychology speak about such incidents in their reviews.
When pity is not love
A few days spent at home relieve stress from the child, he gets the opportunity to be in silence, retire, there is no need to leave his shell, he again falls into the comfort zone. Thus, the baby is affirmed in the idea that the team is a source of painful sensations, in comparison with home conditions.
Making a decision to transfer a child to home education, and subsequently education, parents deprive him of the most important process - primary socialization. In children's collectives, along with education and training, the first ranking takes place, an early social structure is formed, where each takes his place according to the specific role. The ability to exist in a team, to live among one's peers is formed from the age of three, and the earlier this happens, the easier it is for the child later.
In the process of educating a sound engineer, it is difficult to overestimate the very ability to go outside, to express oneself outside, to contact other children. After all, it becomes the basis, the basic mechanism for the subsequent realization of oneself in society throughout life.
On the contrary, home upbringing and education convince the little sound engineer of imaginary exclusivity, genius, raise him even more above others, shifting the focus of the manifestation of psychological properties from giving to consumption. This approach causes great difficulties in the further, already adult, realization of sound properties in society, which means that it makes it impossible to get pleasure from life and one's activities.
How to live in a noisy world with a tuning fork in your ear
A kid going to kindergarten is at the very beginning of his development path, his potential is almost limitless, and he learns quickly and a lot.
Systems thinking, which is formed in the course of Yuri Burlan's training in system-vector psychology, allows you to look at the upbringing of a child, taking into account his unique psychological properties and create conditions for the development of a sound vector that are optimal for a particular child.
The main condition for the development of any child is a strong sense of security and safety that the mother gives.
The task of the parents is to systematically develop the sound vector, to socialize the child among peers, only then will he be able to join society and realize himself. The systemic thinking of parents already in itself gives an increase in the level of confidence in the sound person, the feeling that he is understood, stimulates his exit out of the shell. To support his hobbies, form an appropriate library, an atmosphere of silence, the possibility of solitude, sound circles (swimming, music, astronomy), sound friends, support any attempts to implement outside - all this contributes to the harmonious development of sound properties and greatly facilitates the child's adaptation in the children's team.
The more the child receives the sound vector at home, the faster and easier the skill of adaptation to the noisy conditions of the kindergarten is formed. Raising healthy sound people builds a healthy society, pity is not always good for the child, isolation is never good.
Of course, it is worth realistically assessing the conditions in the kindergarten or school, talking with teachers / educators, explaining the importance of sound loading on the child and the sensitivity of his hearing. For example, there are schools where music is thundering during recess so that children, in their opinion, relax and do exercises. This option is unacceptable for sound children.
Each child is unique, each little person is already a personality, because all psychological qualities are innate, and they can only be developed until the end of puberty.
Understanding is necessary for any child, and it is especially necessary for sound specialists. Yes, they are in pain in the noisy garden among the screaming children. BUT! With systemic education, they are able to learn to adapt and tolerate noise normally. They live in a noisy world, and this skill can and should be developed. Developing the sound, it will be easier and easier for the child, even he himself will not mind shouting for the company.
Come to the upcoming free online lectures on systemic vector psychology by Yuri Burlan and start your systemic discoveries of the child's soul.
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