Unpleasant interlocutor: the main rules of forced communication
Inside each person there is always a sense of their own uniqueness: I am not like others. We seem unique to ourselves. Not surprising, because the main thing is hidden from us …
It would be an impermissible luxury to be able to communicate only with those who are pleasant and interesting to us. And fence yourself off with an insurmountable wall from all repulsive personalities. But alas … An evil boss at work, a hated colleague, annoying relatives, unpleasant friends of friends, neighbors on a bench, washing everyone's bones, even if you don't go outside …
Hundreds of people around us - and they are all different. One is a bore, the other is full of arrogance, the third is constantly complaining, the fourth is finding fault with everything and everyone … But no matter how we like people from our environment, we must live in society, this is our nature. It will cost you more to isolate yourself from everyone and lead a reclusive lifestyle. But if there are types in your life, communication with whom you completely got tired of, but you still have to communicate, perhaps you should understand the psychology of those who torment you with their conversations.
The main law of communication
Inside each person there is always a sense of their own uniqueness: I am not like others. We seem unique to ourselves. It is not surprising, because the main thing is hidden from us, that for the first time became public knowledge thanks to the training of Yuri Burlan "System-vector psychology". This is our single mental device. Eight elements of the unconscious govern human behavior. And all our uniqueness is just the inability to understand these elements in ourselves and to recognize our nature.
Due to the hidden structure of the psyche, during communication between us there is an invisible barrier of misunderstanding. And the more difficult it is to overcome it, the less we have the same properties. When a fast skinner speaks with a slow representative of the anal vector, the latter seems to him as an underdeveloped skinhead and vice versa. In fact, we just do not understand that our behavior is determined by different properties that do not need to be measured by themselves. Each is important and necessary for different areas of overall development.
When a person acquires the ability to distinguish properties and recognize vectors in other people, the invisible barrier between him and his interlocutors seems to be erased. By focusing on a person, determining which vectors they are "told", we remove from him a part of his loneliness. People begin to reach out to someone who understands them and is truly able to feel what is boiling inside them.
So what vectors are they talking about?
Criticism is the only topic of conversation
Criticism under the newfangled word IMHO has firmly established itself in people's conversations. Many easily allow themselves a negative statement on any issue, justifying their stream of dirt with a signature IMHO. People do not get tired of criticizing the government, bosses, neighbors, each other, they will not mind finding flaws in your appearance and, hiding behind care, highlight your shortcomings.
When criticism becomes the only joy of a person, it means that he is guided by the anal vector in a not very good state. A person either lives in resentment, or does not realize his properties at all. Because of this, the natural ability to criticize for the sake of correcting shortcomings turns into denigrating everything and everyone without a real reason.
If you have to deal with such an eternally unhappy person, think about the fact that he is probably very offended at life and is trying to recoup by adding tar wherever he is. This is his way to correct his distorted state of offense by offending the interlocutor.
The best tactic in this case is not to argue with him. Since you will not wait for objectivity, and natural stubbornness will not allow him to accept your point of view, even if you give the most compelling arguments.
All people are idiots
Communication with everyone is like communication, someone is more witty, someone is more erudite, and with this you feel out of place. A cold, arrogant look and a condescending tone let you know that he knows more than all the people put together. And he looks at others like cockroaches not worthy of attention.
This sin is observed for the owner of the sound vector. By nature, he is given the greatest desire for knowledge of the world and the greatest opportunities for its realization. A real genius can turn out from a sound engineer. He feels these inclinations in himself, regardless of whether the properties were developed and whether there is even a drop of genius. Therefore, he treats people accordingly, from above - as if he knows and understands more than others.
But our inner feeling and real possibilities do not always coincide, therefore egocentrism is completely unsupported and unjustified.
You can plug the asshole into the belt with a simple question about the meaning of life, about the meaning of his one particular life, to which he certainly cannot answer, since it is his meaning that is hidden behind seven seals. You can easily understand this issue after completing the training "System-vector psychology", during which not a single question will remain unanswered.
Talk not talk
He asks questions and answers them himself. He completely pays no attention to your "sorry, I'm in a hurry" and continues to involve you in the conversation. And worst of all, he always finds topics of conversation during which his ears simply cannot be torn off. And only by chance glancing at your watch, you realize with horror that he once again took a lot of your time and lied from three boxes. And then, retelling his story to friends, you are dumbfounded to discover that all this is the most complete nonsense.
It is easy to speak and weave fables with incredible reliability in people with an oral vector. Their psyche is arranged in a special way: speaking is their gift, which makes you believe in what is said, no matter how ridiculous it may seem. It becomes necessary for the oralist to speak the teeth of others only when the vector is not developed and its properties are not used for their intended purpose.
But the natural need to speak constantly requires an exit - and any ears that accidentally come across become "victims". Oral is not only able to convincingly lie, he is able to catch your natural shortcomings and talk about exactly what might interest you. That is why it is not possible to turn around and leave.
And oral adherence to swear words is also understandable and not acceptable for everyone. For the same sound professionals, hearing obscenities can be like death. For this I immediately want to kill the talker.
Having determined that in front of you is an oral person who needs to speak out and he chose you as a victim, run without looking back, not being afraid to offend with your refusal to talk. Even before you disappear from his field of vision, he will already catch another victim. And remember that believing his fables is strongly discouraged, despite all the persuasiveness of oral fables.
Emotional touch
She does not know how to speak calmly, like a tsunami, inexorably covering you with a wave of her feelings. The lover did not call back, the cat was stolen, I bought the wrong perfume in the store. And all this with indignation and emotional outbursts. And if it comes to men, she cannot be stopped … She is ready to drown her interlocutor in her worries.
It is especially difficult for a person with a sound vector to withstand such a conversation. He, unlike the spectator, is an introvert, and even completely uninterested in such mundane things. Therefore, all this emotional chatter is a disaster for his hypersensitive ears.
If a person with a visual vector implements it too weakly, then he will use the entire amplitude of emotions exclusively in communication, attacking you with claims that you love him weakly and do not notice. To withstand such an attack is not just not only a sound engineer, but also a thorough and professional speaking person with an anal vector, and a skinny man who is stingy with feelings and words.
Positive communication with everyone
Before you grimace at the fact that an unpleasant interlocutor is approaching you again, think about the fact that you are also the interlocutor. Our attitude towards others, our discontent and irritation from them - is primarily a consequence of our own states. The more dissatisfaction with ourselves we experience, the more intolerant of people. For each of our shortages, there is someone else's unpleasant behavior. And someone else's lack of fulfillment cannot but repel.
But when you understand yourself and your needs at Yuri Burlan's training, you will be able to fill them correctly and come to a more balanced state. And it will be difficult to shake him with the negative of others. Hence, there is more patience and less irritation.
"System-vector psychology" changes the quality of life at any level, in personal perception of the world and in relation to society. The more you are able to understand others' and your own states, the better and more pleasant your communication will be.
