How to stop getting annoyed and angry?
At each stage of interaction, we strive to get something from someone. We do not receive it - there is hostility, aggression, resentment, anger, indignation. There is a way to mathematically accurately understand the difference between expectations and opportunities and determine their points of contact.
One overtook, the other pushed, this change was not enough, a colleague looked the wrong way, the boss gave the wrong order, the husband didn’t chew dinner like that, the child didn’t fold the books like that. Apparently, their common desire is for me to go crazy with anger and resentment. How can you not be angry?
How to stop getting annoyed and angry when it seems that everyone around has conspired to bring you? System-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan will tell you how to cope with irritation for any reason, hatred of a neighbor in a traffic jam, aggression, a desire to call your husband, yell at a child, take offense at your ex for life, get angry at your mother, slam the door and not talk for years. Do you want to communicate with people without the admixture of these nasty emotions that drink all your life energy?
Why are we annoyed and angry?
Anger arises when someone does something differently from what we imagined. System-vector psychology says that without understanding the general principles of the structure of the human psyche, we are aware only of ourselves, we look at everyone through our prism and expect people to realize their desires.
At each stage of interaction, we strive to get something from someone. If we do not receive it, dislike, aggression, resentment, anger, indignation arise. There is a way to mathematically accurately understand the difference between expectations and opportunities and determine their points of contact.
Something went wrong
If something goes against the natural properties of our psyche, we experience discomfort and blame other people for it. It seems that a modern metropolis is a bundle of tension, all human wiring in it can sparkle in an instant for any reason.
And if you figure it out, we are angry and annoyed each about his own - which means that the wires in the bundle of nerves can be unraveled and protected from fire.
Behind the screen of irritation, everyone has their own spectrum of emotions, conditioned by a set of vectors:
skin people are really annoyed and angry;
- owners of the anal vector are offended, do not have time and fall into a stupor;
- urethral - are angry;
- muscles - endure, but if the bowl is overfilled, they may feel rage;
- spectators - ironic and look down snobbishly;
- sound people - feel themselves the smartest, and hide from the "bunch of idiots" alone; aggravation of the condition can grow into hatred of people.
At the root of the same - dislike of what someone thinks and does not the way we want.
A cheat sheet on how to stop getting angry and angry
The scheme is simple:
- We know what serves as an irritant for others → we do not irritate them in this way, or at least we minimize the stress factor.
- We know what makes us angry → relieve stress by realizing natural properties.
|Vector||A reason to get angry and annoyed, that is, to express dislike||How to reduce stress|
|Cutaneous||Loss of time, material and property risks, slowness and tediousness of the owners of the anal vector.||Fill the time with something useful, plan the source of new earnings, read the article How to stop being jealous.|
|Anal||Novelty, change of tasks, the need to act quickly, confusion, curvature of lines, roads, thoughts, lack of principle of skinheads, injustice.||Give the right amount of time, apologize, thank.|
|Urethral||Downgrade.||Admire - just looking up. The king!|
|Muscular||The need to make independent decisions, to separate from the general mass.||Do not require initiative, give the opportunity for manual labor.|
|Visual||Emotionlessness, lack of response to the expression of feelings, mistakes in speech, bad taste, silence.||Give the emotional response you can! The viewer will catch the slightest drop of sincerity. Read the article How to stop worrying.|
|Sound||Noise, screams, talkativeness, material values, own body.||To speak in a half-whisper about the great unearthly. Keep quiet together.|
|Oral||When they don't listen to him.||Listen - only if there is no querulant in front of you. And it's better to send them to public speaking courses.|
|Olfactory||When people do not fulfill their specific roles.||Execute.|
We are enraged not only by a misunderstanding of the manifestations in a person of a vector that we do not have. Sometimes even more irritation is caused by the properties that are in ourselves at a different level of development, in a different state.
For example, a developed skin lawmaker does not digest a skin thief, a visual hysteric is irritated looking at a realized friend in the vector - a "holy man" who helps everyone, and a muse who loves everyone.
How to stop getting angry while driving?
Let's observe life situations from different angles in order to understand how not to get angry and how to stop getting annoyed for any reason.
Driver 1: Where are you going? Can't you see this is a dedicated line? I’m not sticking out. The quieter you go, the further you'll get. And such upstarts only cause a desire to get a club and crack it properly so that he knows his place.
Driver 2: Are you sorry to move a little so I can squeeze through? I hate traffic jams - I am furious, itchy. Precious time is slipping away. Desire to get out of the car and run across the rooftops. It's time to buy a motorcycle, or better, a helicopter!
Systemic advice 1: Adherents of quality and order, the owners of the anal vector do not like to do a lot of things at once - and it is not necessary. Without being distracted from the road, just analyze the differences between your outlook on life and the attitude of that reckless driver. The psyche can be determined without even seeing the driver of the car. Accurate recognition relieves tension, aggression disappears and the desire to break the quickie's body.
Systemic tip 2: If you still can't overtake anyone and have to stand still, just do something useful. You can, for example, shake the muscles of your back, legs and abs. When traffic jam is also a workout, it is not so excruciatingly painful to waste minutes in anticipation. Muscles are pumped - you can work your head too: think over a plan for tomorrow's meeting or a shopping list. Stock news - and those can help you stop getting angry and annoyed.
How to stop getting annoyed with your husband and wife
Wife: He probably doesn't love me at all. He comes back so late, but he comes - you can't get a word out of him. Even on weekends and holidays, you can't find his home - mountains, running, skiing, always plans, projects, meetings. Family doesn't mean anything to him. There is no desire even to go out to meet him. It's a shame to the point of impossibility.
Husband: How can you get together for two hours? The boss is waiting for us for dinner, and she is still fiddling around, she cannot say goodbye to the children. It will take forever to choose a dress too! Enrages.
Opposites along the lower vectors naturally attract into pairs, says Yuri Burlan's system-vector psychology. The only way to stop getting angry and annoyed in family relationships is to understand the difference between your deep priorities and feel the beauty of the merging of opposites, united by common emotions and goals.
A skin husband who works and supports a family does not mean that he is an unloving husband. He was cut by nature in such a way that he runs through life in search of a mammoth (earnings). He is a hunter. And the hunter needs time to breathe, to recuperate. The family serves as such a rear for him. If all that awaits him at home is a silent resentment and a cold dinner - he may not come running at all. What to do? Read here.
Anal vector wife is the best housewife and the most caring mom. If you take her away from home even for several hours, inform about plans in advance. She needs to thoroughly prepare for this psychologically.
Disagreements, irritation and anger at each other in pairs can also occur due to misunderstanding on the upper vectors. She visually sparks with emotions - in a sound way, he needs silence. Orally, he can’t refrain from jokes below the waist - she sounds like it wants to go to the top of a lonely mountain.
You cannot force someone to do something so that you enjoy uninterrupted pleasure. But with the desire to keep the couple and please your beloved, you can, having understood it, stop getting annoyed, angry, offended by the closest person.
How to stop getting angry about anything
With new thinking, Felix stopped being angry with his mother:
Victor is no longer annoyed by his wife's behavior:
Natalia is no longer enraged by her son's slowness:
It became much more pleasant for thousands more people to live. They have no time to get angry and angry - there are many more interesting and happy activities. Do you want to also throw off the burden of anger, aggression and resentment and stop taking offense at the omnipresent injustice? Do you want to feel truly happy?
Then register for a free online training on systemic vector psychology by Yuri Burlan and get a qualitatively new perception of life. Register here.