How to become great, or there is a woman behind every man
What are the forces at work between a man and a woman? How to unlock the greatest potential of this interaction? How to find endless happiness in a relationship, which translates into a vivid male realization? Why should a man look for a woman in order to best manifest all his natural abilities?
Fyodor Dostoevsky and Anna Snitkina, Karl Marx and Jenny von Westfalen, Winston Churchill and Clementine Hozier, Adriano Celentano and Claudia Mori, Sigmund Freud and Martha Bernays, Salvador Dali and Elena Dyakonova (Gala), John Lennon and Yami Ono are behind these names … the great accomplishments of men and the less visible, but no less significant role of their wives. These couples are known for their ardent love, which was carried through decades and was crowned not only with family happiness, but also with deeds that left a significant mark on the history of human society.
Probably, for many, it still remains a mystery, what was the reason for such a powerful manifestation of the talent of these men - creative, political, research? Congenital predestination, strength of temperament? Undoubtedly. But without the women who were next to them, most likely, their talent would not have blossomed so brightly. They themselves, one way or another, talked about this, having lived with their companions for more than a dozen years, expressing their gratitude to them for the inspiration that they found next to them.
System-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan reveals the secret of the interaction between a man and a woman. What forces are at work between them? How to unlock the greatest potential of this interaction? How to find endless happiness in a relationship, which translates into a bright male realization? Why should a man, in order to best manifest all his natural abilities, should seek a woman?
The first condition is to be desired
Not every woman is capable of inspiring a man. For this to happen, attraction must arise between them. A woman should be, above all, desirable for a man.
System-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan says that attraction between a man and a woman arises on the basis of unconscious odors, the source of which are pheromones. Outwardly, it looks like a man chooses a woman. But in fact, a woman chooses first, and if she likes a man, she releases pheromones, which her chosen one catches.
This is how that amazing chemistry of love arises when, for some reason, a man and a woman suddenly inexplicably begins to pull towards each other. And the more accurately they find each other by smell, the stronger the attraction. A strong attraction creates in a man a strong desire for life, for realization. Libido is the life force.
The stronger a man's desire for a woman, the more he is forced to sublimate it into social activity, because it is a force that does not allow lying quietly on the couch.
Sublimation
The love story of Sigmund Freud and Martha Bernays confirms this. What Freud felt for Martha was the real passion that raged between peaks of euphoria of love and despair from the fact that they were separated before marriage, from jealousy and the possibility of rejection.
The whole situation of their long engagement, which lasted four years, three of which they lived in different cities, only fueled this great passion. Both Freud and Martha were raised in strict Jewish traditions, according to which the bride and groom were not even allowed to touch each other before the wedding, let alone satisfy their passion.
In addition, the groom had the right to take responsibility for creating a family only in case of financial solvency. But Freud was poor. He still had to learn and acquire his own practice before leading the most coveted of women down the aisle.
The power of his desire was so great that there was practically not a day when he did not write letters to his beloved. During all this time, he sent her about 900 letters, and it happened that he wrote 3-4 letters a day. The shortest of them was 4 pages, and the longest was 22.
But that's not even the point. To get the hand of his beloved woman, he had to study and work a lot. Such a powerful unfulfilled passion that the future scientist experienced exerted strong pressure on his psychic. Its sublimation resulted in research activities, which laid the foundation for his further scientific discoveries in the field of the psychology of the unconscious, which turned the world upside down. In fact, Freud can be considered the founder of a new science - psychology. And one more thing: he knew a lot about love in order to investigate this issue and place the attraction between a man and a woman as the cornerstone of his psychoanalysis.
But even later, when their dream of uniting came true, Freud did not rest on his laurels. Martha had a strong character. And although she supported her husband in everything, put his affairs as a priority, she did not agree with him in everything, having her own opinion about life. She did not share his scientific interest, but became a reliable rear for him. All his life he had to conquer it, yearning for complete fusion. This only made her even dearer to him.
They have been married for 53 years and, once delimiting their own interests, they no longer returned to disagreements. Their disputes concerned only the method of preparing mushrooms.
What a woman's strong desire can do
What kind of women are they who are attracted to men with such a powerful temperament - the power of desire? And in general, what does it mean for a woman to be desired? Does the degree of a woman's attractiveness depend on how beautiful and well-groomed she is? Partly yes. External data plays a role, but not a determining one.
A woman's attractiveness is determined by her inner state. If her psyche is balanced, she experiences the joy of life, she is more than others able to attract a man to her.
The wives of great men were not ordinary people. They were self-sufficient and balanced people, which created the preconditions for a stable marriage. A man never got enough of this woman, he always revealed something new in her, because she developed, over and over again showing her unexpected facets. The strength of her desire for realization, whether independently or through a man, was so great that it pushed her husband to accomplishments again and again.
So it was in the relationship between Winston Churchill and Clementine Hozier. Their marriage was predicted for a maximum of six months, because the future British Prime Minister seemed not at all created for family relations. He was morose and despised convention. However, Clementine conquered him once and for all. Their marriage lasted 57 years on the constant intensity of feelings that accompanied their relationship from the first day when Churchill saw his future wife. “Clemmi, you gave me the unearthly pleasure of life. I owe you an unpaid debt,”he wrote to her.
Their love correspondence in their entire life amounted to 1,700 letters, postcards, telegrams, and was published by their youngest daughter in the book "Speak for Themselves". “I love you”, “I miss you”, “I am waiting for your letters and I reread them again and again” - warmth and love never left their relationship.
All these years, Clementine steadfastly guided the family ship through the reefs, preventing it from crashing. Not paying attention to the many bad habits that Churchill never gave up, in important matters she showed firmness. When he began to feel dizzy with power, only one of its strict: "You are unbearable", put everything in its place. He always consulted with her on important political issues and never made decisions without her.
She was engaged in the family, but also led an active social activity. In September 1941, she created the "Red Cross Fund to Aid Russia", and on May 9, 1945 she met in the USSR. Winston complained that she was no longer talking about anything except her Fund, the Red Army and the wife of the Soviet ambassador …
A wealth of connections
However, is the union between man and woman based only on attraction? System-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan says that attraction lasts on average up to three years. It is natural for a man to stay close to a woman until the child grows up - the fruit of this attraction. The further fate of the union depends on other ties in the pair: emotional, intellectual, spiritual.
The experience of many great couples confirms this. The union of Karl and Jenny Marx is not only an example of a strong attraction and love for each other, but also a union based on common interests.
They lived one life in which each was an extension of the other. In this life there was no self-denial or sacrifice of the wife towards her husband. In this life, there was a genuine interest of everyone in the work that they do together.
Jenny was not only Karl's wife and beloved woman, but also an inspirer, a companion in revolutionary work, devoted to the idea that her husband promoted. She developed, studied, improved in this idea, not only because she loved her husband, but also because through him she truly imbued with the idea of revolution, so that she became her idea, her desire.
"You could praise me for my Greek … This morning I have already studied … three articles about Hegel and the message about the publication of Bruno's book," she wrote to her husband. Their correspondence contained not only constantly sincere and warm declarations of love for each other, but also a discussion of the intricacies of party work, plans for "work for humanity," as Marx called his activities. Being very diplomatic, she corresponded with many of Karl's associates, because he was physically not enough for everything. She also rewrote Marx's articles for publication. And yet Jenny's only concern was how her dear husband and children were feeling.
Daughter Eleanor wrote: "It would not be an exaggeration if I say that without Jenny von Westphalen Karl Marx could never have become what he was." Marx also admitted this: “I again feel myself as a man in the full sense of the word, for I feel a great passion … not love for Feuerbach's“man,”for Moles-Schott's“metabolism,”for the proletariat, but love for my beloved, namely for you, makes a person a person in the full sense of the word”.
How these words echo with the statement of the System-Vector Psychology of Yuri Burlan that it is the desire for a woman that drives a man, makes him develop and change the environment. From animal to man, from a stone ax to the ideas of transforming society - all these are the steps along which humanity ascends, thanks to the attraction of a man to a woman.
Neither severe material deprivation, nor illness, nor her husband's betrayal could shake the happy constancy of this relationship, because they represented all the components of a lasting union between a man and a woman - sexual, emotional, intellectual, spiritual ties. Such a couple rises above simple human, material, everyday happiness, because its participants are not closed on each other, but are concentrated on something "third" that unites them.
Something third
The system-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan calls the existence of this very "third" one of the conditions for a happy and long union, to which the attention of partners besides each other switches. This is an important prerequisite to ensure that the entire potential of this connection does not go inward, does not turn into a musty swamp, does not become a reason for reproaches for insufficient attention, everyday routine and other negative manifestations of a long life together.
For different vectors, this "third" can be different. A vector in system-vector psychology is a set of innate desires and properties of a person that determine his behavior, value system, thinking processes, reactions to surrounding situations. There are eight vectors in total.
What will be the “third” for a couple is determined by their value system, by what is important to both in life, except for love for each other. So, for a couple of people with an anal vector, these can be children, because family, procreation is their value. People with a visual vector can unite in love of the theater or in charity, as many actors do. For two sound professionals, an intellectual or spiritual connection is important.
This connection united Fedor Mikhailovich Dostoevsky and Anna Grigorievna Snitkina. Arriving at the writer's house as a stenographer at a difficult time for him, she was so imbued with the greatness of his lot, his work to reveal the human soul, that she could not leave.
“My love was purely head, ideological. It was rather adoration, admiration for a man so talented and possessing such high spiritual qualities … The dream of becoming a companion of his life, sharing his labors, making his life easier, giving him happiness took possession of my imagination, and Fyodor Mikhailovich became my god, my idol, and I, it seems, was ready to kneel before him all my life”, - this is how Anna Grigorievna described her attitude towards her husband.
"God handed you over to me," Fyodor Mikhailovich justly noted three months after the wedding. She shared with him the burden of his labor to the fullest. Possessing a strong grasp of everyday life, she adjusted their life, put in order the writer's affairs, freeing him from debts that had formed after unsuccessful attempts to publish magazines. She stenographed, rewrote his novels, read proofs, organized the publication of books. Gradually, all financial affairs were completely at her disposal, which had a very favorable effect on their family budget.
Again, we see a disregard for the worldly burdens of life in the name of a unifying idea. Neither the difficult character of her husband, nor his passion for the game, nor the death of two children, nor financial difficulties could weaken this connection.
At the same time, they remained equal partners, allowing each other to be themselves: “… They always remained themselves, not in the least echoing or forging to each other. And they did not get involved with their soul: I - in his psychology, he - in mine, and thus my good husband and I - we both felt like a free soul."
Two people with a sound vector have fully realized their potential as a couple, because they found an idea worth living for and worth serving - the idea of opening the human soul through literary work. And here we are faced with another reason why the union of a man and a woman can take place - the right choice of a partner. How to find the right partner? How to create a relationship in which everyone's potential can be maximized?
Precise natural couple
System-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan allows you to answer this question in the most accurate way. Knowing the set of a person's vectors, one can predict whether a relationship will develop or not, whether there will be growth, development or not. This science introduces the concept of a natural pair, that is, one in which a man and a woman are most suitable for each other.
For example, such a pair is a man with a urethral vector and a woman with an optic dermal ligament vectors. There are many examples in history when such a couple revealed their great potential.
The urethral vector adjusts its owner to bestowal, full appeal to the needs of other people, whose life is dearer to such a person than his own. Such a man is not created for a quiet family life, and only one woman is capable of creating a long-term relationship with him - a woman with a skin-visual ligament of vectors, which is his muse, his inspirer.
She herself does not prioritize family values, engaging in social fulfillment with pleasure, and with a high degree of development - charity. He does not belong to her, and she does not belong to him, but they cannot live without each other. She is his eternal source of life, inspiration. And for her, he is the one who gives a complete feeling of security and safety and the opportunity to experience the brightest feeling of love. Among these natural couples are Salvador Dali and Gala, Adriano Celentano and Claudia Mori.
The famous Italian actor owes much to his irreplaceable dermato-visual muse Claudia Mori for his stormy success in cinema and on stage. When their relationship was just beginning, she made a wise decision to fully devote herself to her husband's affairs. She immediately understood: being the wife of Celentano is a profession. And she was his image maker, producer, administrator of the recording studio "Clan Celentano". In this pair, everyone turned out to be a fulfilled, realized person, thanks to that volcano of love, which gave an exact natural combination of partners' vectors.
Another example of such a favorable combination of properties in the modern world can serve as pairs with the skin-sound-visual ligament of vectors. This is more a human connection than an animal one. The cutaneous vector has a low libido, and the two upper vectors - visual and sound - make animal attraction not very significant in the lives of these people. Their connection is based more on emotional, intellectual and spiritual connections.
Such a man is looking for a companion in a woman, an interlocutor, a person equal to himself, with whom you can open your soul. In such a pair, common interests and emotional openness become priorities.
An example of such a relationship was the pair John Lennon - Yoko Ono. He had an unusually developed visual vector, which made him a great humanist, much ahead of his time. He needed an unusual woman, not down to earth, not "animal", with the same potential, an exact reflection of himself.
Yoko Ono was such a woman. In her attitude towards him, a sound vector was visible - she idolized him, not experiencing any possessive desires in relation to him. They did not know jealousy, dislike for each other. In a sense, this relationship was ahead of its time, showing us a pattern of deep spiritual connection, not based on animal attraction, on smells.
Everyone is great in their own way
The experience of great couples shows us that it is possible to unleash the tremendous potential that the relationship between a man and a woman contains. Of course, not all people from birth have such a great temperament (according to system-vector psychology - the power of desire), as those described in this article.
But in each pair, you can achieve the happiness of absolute love and full realization at the highest level that is only possible for them, if the partners have knowledge of the psychic. After all, then they fully understand their desires and desires of a partner, possess the forces that set the nuclear reactor of love in motion, achieving happiness and great satisfaction from life.
Great couples came about by chance. And you can build your life consciously, thanks to the knowledge of the system-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan. Register for free online lectures here.
