Teachers. Our children are raised by ZERO the old fashioned way
The world is changing, we are changing. But we continue to practice the familiar learning technologies, while stubbornly not noticing how our children have changed. Currently, there is a growing chasm of misunderstanding between children and adults. Can it be argued that teachers are to blame? Not at all. Rather, they lack understanding of what is happening to children and how to guide them in the conditions in which we live today.
In front of the door marked 1 "A" stood a small boy with a large briefcase and shifted from foot to foot. He was late and now hesitated to enter the class, where the lesson was already taking place. Looking at his torment, I vividly remembered how difficult it was for me, when delays and missed lectures accumulated problems, and decided to help him make this necessary decision.
- Don't be afraid, come in. Believe me, it's better not to delay this,”I said, smiling encouragingly. Giving me a trusting look, the kid pulled the heavy door towards him and entered the classroom. And at the same moment, the measured speech of the teacher, coming from behind the door, turned into a cry:
- Why are you late? Answer me!
But there was no answer. He probably stood there with downcast eyes, and regretted that he had listened to my advice. The teacher continued to shout, still demanding immediate explanations, and I, leaving the school corridor, pulled my head into my shoulders, feeling my powerlessness and involuntary guilt. After all, next time the boy will perceive the well-wisher with caution and would rather prefer to take a walk. And if the class lady was so curious about the reason for being late, wouldn't it be wiser to talk to the student about this after the lesson, without making the whole class witness to the conversation …
Trust or verify
This tiny episode from school life marks only a small part of the problems that our children become hostages to, while their everyday life at school often remains hidden from parents. When sending our child to a child care institution, we are sure that we entrust his development to professionals, certified specialists. And therefore, when all kinds of emergencies are brought to our attention, they become a real shock for us. These consequences of invisible causes should make us wonder if we can afford the habitual blind trust when it comes to our child.
The attitude of the teacher and the atmosphere of the children's collective seriously affect the development of the personality and thereby largely predetermine the adult life, the possibilities for the successful realization of the future member of society. If the parents are familiar with Yuri Burlan's training "System-Vector Psychology", they are able to smooth out possible negative external influences within the family. But it cannot be completely ruled out.
Currently, there is a growing chasm of misunderstanding between children and adults. And if in the recent past they spoke more often about difficult children, now more and more difficult classes are mentioned, and finding a common language with children from a difficult category has become even more difficult.
Can it be argued that teachers are to blame? Not at all. Rather, they lack understanding of what is happening to children and how to guide them in the conditions in which we live today.
In 2005, a primary school teacher told me that the first grade is so unaffected by the influence that she has absolutely no idea what to do about it. But this was not a girl who graduated from a teacher training college, but a specialist with experience, a creative person, an innovative teacher who uses the latest techniques in her work, taking into account the recommendations of traditional psychology.
Today comes imperceptibly
The world is changing, we are changing. But we continue to practice the familiar learning technologies, while stubbornly not noticing how our children have changed. Yes, they used to work, at a time when the lack of understanding between generations was not such a serious problem. Now the problem is ripe, but there are also ways to solve it.
From the standpoint of the training "System-Vector Psychology", the picture observed in the modern school is explained so clearly that any teacher can be convinced of its validity, simply by comparing it with personal experience. Explaining the role of a specific person in a team helps to understand the entire system of relationships between children, and today's child becomes more understandable to any teacher.
For example, if a thief suddenly turns up in the classroom, you shouldn't give him a general bullying. Most likely, this is a child with a skin vector and at home he is raised by assault. He steals because he is being beaten, and another entry in his diary, which can provoke new beatings at home, will only worsen the situation. It is not always possible to re-educate parents in our realities, the belt is still not considered an instrument of crime, although it takes away from children something no less valuable than physical health. But you can try to help the child with harmonious development in the team. Among his innate qualities are the desire for leadership, organizational skills and logical thinking. Understanding the possible ways of his development, it is much easier to direct such a child to an adequate and socially acceptable realization of his properties.
Differentiation according to innate properties is an indispensable condition for comprehensive and correct development. We have almost learned to do this for physical properties: it is unlikely that anyone would think of giving a large-boned, well-fed child to the gymnastics section in the hope of raising an Olympic champion. But we still don't know what to do with the innate properties of the psyche. Traditional educational psychology is unable to help, since there is simply no such differentiation in its arsenal.
Everyone is talking about a personal touch, but it's still just words. In fact, the training programs are unified, they offer the same work with children who have different speed of perception and the preferred way of assimilating information from birth, different reactions to the way in which they receive encouragement or censure. Among the educational goals at present, there are only those that are aimed at assimilating knowledge.
A critical mass of errors in the luggage of obsolete knowledge
A more complex and gifted new generation remains incomprehensible, but if only that. Today, the same mistakes are made that led to sad consequences before. For example, a future mathematical genius - a child with a sound vector - could be mistaken for a mentally retarded, since an unprepared teacher attributed his communication features to inhibited thinking, a slow reaction.
You have probably met such children. They are often immersed in themselves, prefer to live in the inner world of their thoughts, they are interested there and it is normal for them. From childhood they love and know how to think. The teacher's address reaches the consciousness of such a child immediately, he knows the answer in a second. But due to the peculiarities of the psyche, he needs time to get out of his inner world, and only after that to answer. If a teacher has a skin vector, she, with all her impatience, will start harassing the child - "Why are you silent?" or even call him a moron.
Take a closer look at your pensive baby: hasn't it happened to you, taking him out of his reverie, to notice such a characteristic repetition of him "Huh?.. What?.. Me?.." If yes, you have reason to think that you are the parent of a sound engineer …
Just a teacher's mistake from ignorance can lead to an incorrect assessment of the child's mental abilities, and the result can be a medical diagnosis with all that it implies - a broken life, ruined fate. Such a child will not be able to fully realize himself, and this is all the more terrible because by nature he is endowed with a brilliant mind.
Mental retardation, on the one hand, hyperactivity, on the other. All kinds of diagnoses are given to our absolutely normal and sometimes even gifted children. Possessing certain innate properties of their own and not being able to correctly recognize the innate properties of another, a teacher or school psychologist measure the normality of our children by themselves. There is no official test or standard for determining hyperactivity. There is only a recommended list of signs, and if we analyze them systematically, it is obvious that some of them describe children with a skin vector, but most exactly correspond to the innate properties of children with a urethral vector.
Regarding the latter, unfortunately, both teachers and parents make a lot of fateful mistakes, since it is children with the urethral vector that do not fit into the usual image of a normal child as much as possible.
More often than not, these are the very difficult children and informal leaders who are capable of crazy actions, and will drive the teacher crazy, disrupting lessons and taking the whole class with them. They are always independent, despise discipline and teach only what they themselves want, although they could easily do brilliantly in all subjects.
Educators with an innate flair and talent for their profession understand that if properly encouraged and motivated, then such a bully can be turned into someone who is able to rally a class. In this case, the urethral boy perfectly realizes the properties assigned to him from birth. It seems like a paradox, but this child does not need to be guided. It is enough just not to interfere and show him the direction of development. And then, becoming an adult, such a person will take care of the welfare of society above everything else.
If, however, a child with a urethral vector is constantly suppressed and trying to frame, which often happens, then against the background of misunderstanding in his own family, he chooses a destructive, antisocial line of behavior. Having matured, he can become the leader of criminals, and in childhood it remains a universal problem, from which both teachers and the parents of his classmates dream of getting rid of, having shoved the boy into a correctional institution through the children's room of the police.
SASHA
Active, unpredictable and disobedient, such a child grew up before my eyes. Sasha, the son of my friend, is practically the same age as my son. Thanks to frequent meetings, I could observe all of his extraordinary manifestations up close. Presenting a problem to adults wherever he went, he still seemed very gifted to me. I constantly noted his intelligence and desire for knowledge, and I wondered why none of the adults, including his mother and kindergarten teachers, saw and appreciated these qualities in him.
When I spoke to him, he was open to dialogue, showed remarkable abilities, but did not shine with success in training. It always seemed to me that he was not being given something, that my girlfriend was not able to be an authority to him and even just a friend, simply because she was not given it. Now that I have completed the training "System Vector Psychology", I understand that a mother with a skin vector, who does not know anything about her urethral child, simply could not behave otherwise, he was doomed to misunderstanding and unreasonable prohibitions.
Things got worse at school. I don’t know how his relationship developed in the classroom and with the teachers, but I didn’t hear anything good about him at that time. Disregard for study and discipline, and even - oh horror! - once he urinated right in the classroom in response to the teacher's refusal to let him go from class. By the fifth grade, the situation became so tense that at a specially organized parent meeting, mothers, led by the teacher, unanimously asked me to write a letter of appeal to some authorities with a request to transfer Sasha to hell …
- You can write such a letter on behalf of all parents, right? - the teacher asked quite kindly. A hostage of the situation and her own ignorance, she was powerless to change anything and was in line with the demands of the parent team.
“I will not write this letter,” I answered, gathering my courage. - And if someone else writes, I will not sign it. I ask you to understand me correctly, it's just that I'm a little better than you, I know this boy from childhood, he is not at all what you think.
Having put into my monologue all my warm attitude towards the child, I told my mothers that at that time it seemed to me to be true: that Sasha simply does not have enough love and how wonderful he is. Now I know that in fact it was not love that was lacking, but understanding, that both mother and teachers lacked systemic knowledge.
In that situation, I succeeded in the incredible: I changed the atmosphere of the meeting, the general mood from aggressive to sympathetic. No one wrote any letter, and Sasha graduated from elementary school in the same class. Nevertheless, I understand that his fate will not work out as well as it could, and I am very sorry that I did not know about the systemic approach before. If I hinted to a friend that a little leader was born to her, perhaps she would have treated him with great attention and understanding. And if the teachers who were engaged in his upbringing knew what innate qualities this child possesses, his childhood could be completely different.
Unfortunately, such illustrative cases are not isolated. It is also difficult to understand the behavior of urethral children from the outside, because among teachers there are no people with a urethral vector, such people are not inclined to realize themselves in this profession.
Work on bugs
The need to differentiate personality types deserves no less attention, but at the moment no one cares about this. Pedagogy as a science is still blind and continues to evolve by touch, if you can call it development. But those who really want to see what each of the children entrusted to him breathes can already achieve this today.
A trained teacher who has an understanding of the properties of vectors and is able to systematically determine innate qualities will be able to properly encourage an obedient and diligent child with an anal vector, direct the activity and pragmatism of the skin vector in the right direction, help a vulnerable and impressionable child with a visual vector to develop, be attentive to the owner of the vector sound …
Due to the general reluctance to break the old schemes and consider possible alternatives, the teacher's professional ability to differentiate children still does not seem necessary to most of us. And although every mother perfectly sees how her child is different from others, we do not make such demands on teachers. And it should be, since it is a differentiated approach based on systems thinking that will not only solve obvious problems, but also qualitatively improve the education of our children, help create an atmosphere in the children's team that contributes to the best development of each child. And only then the inclusion of harmonious personality development in the list of educational goals will not be an empty declaration.
This is not as difficult as it seems at first glance, it is much more difficult for all of us to get rid of ingrained stereotypes, to realize how serious all this is, to understand and see that our children will pay for our unwillingness to change anything - with their own destiny, and therefore the whole society as a whole.
