Secrets of great love - psychoanalysis for adults
"People meet, people fall in love, get married …", only for some it all goes peacefully, calmly, without excesses, "like people", while for others - with changes from the freezing temperature of relations to the blazing fires of passion and back.
Love will come unwittingly …
Love for all ages.
There is no life without love.
Love lives on for centuries.
Love is immortal!
"People meet, people fall in love, get married …", only for some it all goes peacefully, calmly, without excesses, "like people", while for others - with changes from the freezing temperature of relations to the blazing fires of passion and back.
Do we feel love differently?
Why is one person able to fall in love once and for all, while another (or the other) loses his head every spring?
How to make love mutual and protect yourself from pain, disappointment, resentment and mental trauma?
What happens to crazy and passionate love after the registry office and honeymoon? What is the secret of longevity in love relationships and does it exist?
In this article we will look behind the curtain of traditions, stereotypes, common opinions and platitudes, discard the veil of mystery, mystery and inexplicability of the origin of this magical feeling and for the first time we will understand the nature of this feeling.
"Professional" lovers
According to system-vector psychology, there are people who are created for love in the truest sense of the word. They know how to love like no one else, plunging into this feeling with their heads and living it with all their hearts, at the peak of emotions and experiences.
These are people with a visual vector. Sensory masters and emotion specialists. Impressionable, with eyes and soul wide open to meet the whole world, who find the greatest pleasure in experiencing and expressing their emotional states.
Where did they come from?
In primitive times, such people performed the role of day guards of the pack. Only their unusually keen eyesight and observation made it possible to notice the approaching danger in the form of predators or enemies. And great emotionality made it possible to instantly get scared, feeling fear, like any other emotion, with a maximum amplitude. Initially, it was the fear of death that saved the life of both the entire tribe and the owner of the visual vector, who, being the most sensitive and compassionate, was not able to stand up for himself either in war or hunting.
Over time, the defense strategy improved, and the need for the ability to quickly and brightly be afraid disappeared. But the need for emotional swings persisted deep in the psychic. Visual people have learned to turn their ancient fear into experiences FOR OTHERS, that is, to sympathize, empathize with their fellow tribesmen, they have learned to LOVE.
And just as primitive spectators enjoyed fulfilling their specific role as professional frightened people, so modern visual people enjoy falling in love “professionally”.
Love for people, like compassion and sacrifice, is the highest level of development of the visual vector, to which all of humanity has been moving for 50 thousand years and to which, under favorable conditions, each individual visual person can develop until the end of puberty.
Developed representatives of the visual vector find their realization in the role of theater and film actors, art workers, journalists, doctors, employees of charitable foundations, teachers or educators.
If the development of the vector does not take place, a person remains at a primitive level to receive modest, small pleasure from his fear and other emotional changes, such as hysterics in public, scandals with smashing dishes, slamming the door and theatrical attempts at suicide.
Many women have a solid heart inside, and even this beautiful head.
Jean Paul
The same need for emotional swings, high sensitivity, impressionability, a tendency to make an elephant out of a fly and conjecture "missing" details makes the audience very amorous.
Emotional rupture of previous relationships, stormy passions of a new novel, feelings overwhelm. But it is impossible to live long at the peak of emotions, gray everyday life sets in, passionate Romeo turns into an ordinary Vasya, and we still yearn for the embodiment of the Hollywood plot in real life. And if at this moment on our way another sultry macho is encountered, everything is repeated anew, bringing a sea of suffering to both ourselves and our loved ones.
Understanding your desires and needs makes it possible to find the embodiment of your sensuality and emotionality in other areas of activity, without rushing through a painful break from one relationship to another.
"Teapots" also know how to love!
And what about the rest?
Is it possible that no one else, except the spectators, is capable of truly loving?
Why not? We all feel attracted to the opposite sex, we all feel sympathy for the person, build relationships and even create families.
Are we falling in love? Yes!
After all, we have learned something from spectators for 50 thousand years? Every step in the development of any vector becomes the property of everyone.
Yes, we have learned to love each other in the best sense of the word, but our love, not supported by a whirlwind of visual emotions, not colored by stormy passions of visual impulses and sensual confessions, just becomes imperceptible and faded next to such a dizzying plot of visual love.
Competing in acting with an actress from the Bolshoi Theater is simply pointless, just like trying to make the plot of a Hollywood movie out of your life. The owners of other vectors are happy in their own way, they are not attracted by the audience and the light of the spotlights, they do not need the stormy passions of family life. Love for them is one of the components of happiness, but not the very purpose of life.
In this case, if everything is so simple, why are so many people left alone?
Why does a relationship that started so successfully break down after three years, as if nothing had happened?
Because of what love leaves like water through your fingers, and more recently such close people become strangers?
The power of attraction
It all starts with sex. Yes, yes, no matter how ardent adherents of platonic love protested, no matter how they call it kinship of souls, mutual spiritual penetration, intellectual closeness, but at the very beginning it is still ATTRACTION.
That spark that runs between a man and a woman, that interest when their views meet, that very moment when she involuntarily straightens her hair, and he straightens his back - this awakened a mutual desire for SEX, and not to discuss the political situation in the country …
This is the reason for mutual embarrassment. A slight blush appears on her cheeks, eyelashes fall, thoughts are confused for a moment, and the thread of conversation is lost, he has a desire to do something for her: give her a hand, give flowers, invite to dinner - earn her favor, show himself from the best side, conquer.
This later, then they will discover in each other a lot in common and different, pleasant and not so much, and they will decide whether to live together or to part, and while the ancient force of attraction is working, once ensuring the continuation of the human race. And it was then that "once", in primitive times, a three-year period was enough to give birth to offspring and teach them to stand firmly on their feet. This is such a primitive psychology of love.
Therefore, the power of attraction keeps us together for about three years, then gradually interest in each other is lost, feelings fade away, relationships collapse. We part, blaming each other for everything and looking for reasons in the little things. And, considering ourselves already experienced, we plunge into new relationships with even greater hopes for success, which melt over the years, and everything repeats again.
Is there a way out?
History knows cases when "they lived happily ever after …", so again we turn to the "professionals."
Visual measure - and again it saves the world from "dislike"!
It is possible to live life with one partner in peace and harmony. Since we no longer belong to the animal world, we need something more than animal attraction to maintain relationships. It, like a match, ignites our hearts with passion, connects us with each other, pushes, throws into embraces, but just as quickly burns out and goes out. But if, while a match is burning, you light a fire with it and constantly put fresh logs in it, you can create a real home that will warm and attract everyone around you.
All the same visual vector taught us all to create emotional ties with our partner, and this is a completely different, higher level of interpersonal relations, which gives a much stronger union that can exist for many years.
If in those three years, while the passions of love are raging at the level of our animal nature, we will consciously be able to build an emotional connection with each other at the level of human nature, we will be united by much stronger ties than attraction.
No matter how we complained about fate, or cited the cruel facts of our pathological bad luck, everything remains only in our hands.
Whether to love to live or to love to fear, to deliberately work on building our long-term relationships, or to rely on a lucky coincidence - the choice is ours.
System-vector psychology gives an understanding of what is happening, describes the deep mechanisms of the psychology of love, reveals the secrets of emotions and the secrets of the affairs of the heart. You can find out the details and details of building family relationships by representatives of the skin and anal vectors at the free introductory lectures.
