What is true love? From love to hate: in the footsteps of true love
A magical state is to breathe from meeting to meeting, from call to call. When adrenaline is overwhelming, you grab this spring cocktail in wide sips, rejoice and live. You do not exist, but you live, breathing deeply and enjoying every moment together. What it is? - True love?
It's one step from love to hatred. We remember this phrase from childhood and believe it, in fact, not understanding the true meaning of either the word "hatred", or, moreover, the word "love". And at the same time, from the same childhood, many of us dream of true love, being confused elementarily in our own desires, dreams, aspirations and stereotypes.
What is true love? How is it different from love addiction and falling in love? How not to be mistaken?
A magical state is to breathe from meeting to meeting, from call to call. When adrenaline is overwhelming, you grab this spring cocktail in wide sips, rejoice and live. You do not exist, but you live, breathing deeply and enjoying every moment together.
What it is? - True love?
Unlikely. Magically. But short-lived. The euphoria goes away quickly. What remains?
What is at the root of this attraction? We immediately talk about true love, assure ourselves and our loved ones that this is what we feel. And definitely forever. Until the grave. Everytime. But after a couple of weeks, losing the first acuity of feelings, we are already slipping out of the relationship. We are surprised, disappointed, or …
Or the opposite. We are deadly attached to a person, we grab any of his words on the fly … We go crazy. Dependent on him completely. We give ourselves to him to the last drop and expect the same in return.
And if we don't get it?
This article is about what real love is, how it differs from falling in love and love addiction. It will give an understanding of these states from the position of the System-Vector Psychology of Yuri Burlan. What exactly did you face?
And what to do in order not to go crazy and be already happy?
But first, watch a short excerpt from a free lecture on system-vector psychology, where Yuri Burlan says that he will give an understanding of a person from the inside:
What is true love: the origins
True love at first sight? Many dream about this, dream of this state, not realizing that it is not about love at all, and, moreover, not about true love …
All love states are characteristic of people with a visual vector. And the development of the vector depends on what exactly a person is able to experience. The whole range of emotions from the hysterical desire "love me, I feel bad without your attention" to the contemplative "I love the world and I feel good if you feel good." One root - and two extremes. Emotion! Emotional connections. Attachment. Love. Love. Passion.
What is true love and being in love?
Falling in love covers us with a wave. Instant and crushing, dulling the sense of reality and bringing down the whole world on the head, not giving time and opportunity to look back, think, accept … She is bright, emotional, this is a peak that can just as quickly and easily subside and disappear altogether. Sometimes right away. Sometimes after a while.
She, at times, is quite hysterical, absolutely emotional and not deep. This state is characteristic of almost all people with a visual vector. This is the diffusion of feelings, the euphoria of a nascent relationship. She has an indirect relationship to true love.
Almost every one of us has encountered it. These are the very sighs, songs under the window, romance, a kind of "rosy". What they sing about, write about, live and breathe. What skeptics laugh at.
This is an absolutely normal state of the eye. People with a visual vector are unusually amorous. They build emotional bonds instantly. Moreover, often in large quantities - with different objects.
No matter how strong the love is, you should not forget that this is a temporary phenomenon. It can be the foundation for a relationship. But they will never be their only component.
It can develop into wild passion or addiction. And it can bring burning pain. Or joy.
What is true love and love addiction as the opposite of true love
Love addiction is one of the most painful conditions that a person with a visual vector can experience. "Unrequited love" is often accompanied by it, turning the soul inside out and discoloring the surrounding world. Under certain conditions, the spectator is able to create an emotional connection with one person, bringing down all his feelings on him. Literally drowning him in a volcano of passions.
A person with love addiction is firmly attached to the object of his passion. Thinks about him around the clock. Is hysterical without getting enough attention. It should be noted that any attention, any responsive feeling will be insufficient. All the time there is little man, few of his words, actions, little … little! I want him to completely dissolve in the same relationship.
In fact, deep processes here are reduced to an urgent need to be visible. And get what you want so much, no matter what.
At the same time, the addicted person himself often thinks that he lives for the sake of this person (and in fact lives for him and exclusively for himself), that this is true love. “The roof has blown off”, “he drives me crazy”, “I can't help but see him”, “I don't want to live without him.” This is just a hysteria caused by one single desire - to get a person completely.
As much as it hurts. No matter how you convince yourself that you really love, you need to get rid of love addiction. This is a destructive state, emotional buildup, which under no circumstances can become the basis for a relationship. This is hysteria in the visual vector, a painful condition, dissatisfaction that tears you apart from the inside, as well as a hurricane crushes the life of the one who is so dear to you.
What is true love as it is?
True love is calm and dignified. It does not swing you with a pendulum, does not throw you into a storm. She is like the sea, slightly touched by a warm breeze. Warming. Warm. Creative. There is no hysteria and fear in her. And there is no pain either.
If this is True Love, then there is no selfishness in it and the desire to be loved. She has a desire to bestow. Not to say that "I will throw the whole world at his feet," but really give.
True love is contemplative. Only people with a developed visual vector who do not experience fear are capable of it. Pushing out all their natural fears through compassion. It’s impossible to truly love one person and remain callous to the rest of the world. In true love, the state is even, powerful. When you love, you truly see and love the whole world. And he, in turn, is painted with bright, amazing colors.
You must learn to love!
How? Through the development of the visual vector. Through compassion. Learn to give. And receive only in order to give.
For a visual person, true Love is a cherished state to which he subconsciously strives. We write about it, sing, talk, breathe it. But we don't know how to love. Get rid of fears to learn. And be happy.
Listen to what Yulia says about how her relationship with her husband changed when she learned to love, and not demand love for herself:
