Overheard conversations. Lazy husband: what to do?
Very often we can hear conversations of married or divorced women about their current and former husbands. And we often witness the same sore subject: a lazy husband. Agree, such lazy husbands are not uncommon. Those who pull to the last before doing something. The phenomenon of such behavior is explained at the training "System-vector psychology" by Yuri Burlan.
Very often, intentionally or unintentionally, I hear conversations of married or divorced women about their current and former husbands. And often I become a witness to the same sore subject: a lazy husband.
“My son is all like a father! - a woman of about forty shares her sad experience with her friend. - He knows everything, understands everything, but is lazy. He will not do anything himself: he always pulls to the last, constantly has to force, coerce, give impetus to action. His dad is exactly the same. A wonderful father, a good family man, but … all the time I had to "kick" him. Do this, do that. Our repair lasted for years, decades. The shelf was not twisted for a year, probably, until my patience ran out. I didn’t really earn money: I didn’t advance up the career ladder, I’ve all worked, for some ten years already, at my plant and didn’t even think about going up until I started cutting it. Tired, terribly tired of carrying everything on yourself!"
“A guy who has to do something all the time… we know those. I don’t want to mess with people like that anymore,”says another woman.
And after all, you see, such "lazy" husbands are not uncommon. Those who pull to the last before doing something. The phenomenon of such behavior is explained at the training "System-vector psychology" by Yuri Burlan.
Life is an integral part of our life, no matter how some of us renounce and deny it. And how wonderful it would be if we all had a servant in our house who would cook, wash the clothes, fix the toilet bowls, and screw the shelves. But, alas, often in the conditions of Russian reality, we ourselves perform all these not always pleasant duties. Who is in that much: who prepares food, and who cobbles furniture.
And then, of course, I remember the eternal anecdote about the wife who asked her husband to throw out the Christmas tree, to which he complained: “Throw out the Christmas tree! Throw out the tree! People went to the May Day demonstrations, and she got it right: throw out the tree!"
There is a certain type of husband who is very difficult to get to do anything. And the point is not at all that they are villains and villains. Not. They are happy to help, but not now. But this "not now" can last for days, weeks, months. Until his wife whips to death … And then he does it in five minutes, and you're done.
The tendency to postpone until tomorrow is inherent in people with an anal vector, who have a special fear on an unconscious level: the fear of starting. Slow on their own, anal sex is often a drag on life. This is due to the peculiarities of physiology, which we will not go into. The bottom line is that starting is always excruciatingly painful on a psychological level for such people.
The fear of starting is also associated with innate perfectionism, the desire to do everything at the highest level. We are scared to start work, because we are afraid that something will go wrong, it will turn out badly, imperfect, they will not approve of us, they will scold us. We are marking time in uncertainty, not daring to take a step forward. Until we start, we imagine ourselves to be anyone: a brilliant artist, writer, sculptor … The only catch is what needs to be started and done. And we know we can, but how scary it is to just pick up and get to work!
By the way, we make decisions in the same way: we hesitate for a long time, we suffer and in no way can we finally give birth to at least something!
A person with an anal vector harnesses for a long time: carries a thought in himself, accumulates data, accumulates inspiration, tries on, estimates, weighs all the pros and cons … we do everything we wanted. And, believe me, we will bring what we have begun to the cherished point, to its logical conclusion. This is another "fad" of people with an anal vector: if you started, then bring it to the ideal. Otherwise, we experience over-stress and terrible discomfort.
Let's return to our lazy husbands, who all the time have to be forced to do something. Jack of all trades, only does nothing until you torture me with requests. How to live with it? How to fight?
Of course, there are two ways: to pull to death, to a heart attack (sometimes in the literal sense of the word) or "give a magic kick." The first option, as you understand, is not the most rational, because you will definitely not achieve anything by constant sawing. Your invaluable lazy husband is already uncomfortable with the fact that he cannot start, do not add fuel to the fire. Moreover, stubbornness can turn on in him, and your faithful already from the principle (and anal people are very principled) will not do anything.
Then what is the right way to give the “cherished pendel”? Here you need to be more cunning, to be able to correctly push a man to the right actions. First, it is important to make the person with the anal vector feel as if he himself made the decision to do something. Secondly, praise your loved one more often, tell him how great it is when there is a real man in the house, a jack of all trades. Tell me how pleased you will be if he helps you with this and that. Instill in him confidence, the desire to move forward, and not stagnate, and you will see that everything will start to change for the better!
People with an anal vector are the most insecure people. When you know your own characteristics, you feel their cause from within, you begin to regulate your actions and states. When you feel another person and his properties, you begin to consciously correct your behavior. Remember: a husband's laziness is often an oversight of an ignorant wife.
