The secret to a happy relationship
A man is looking for a woman who inspires him. A woman in a pair relationship receives from a man a sense of security and protection, confidence in the future and, as a result, the desire to have a child. This concept of relationships seems pretty simple and straightforward. Then what violates it? Why do people who love each other experience dissatisfaction with relationships over time?
At some point, a relationship that only yesterday brought so much joy ceases to inspire. Quarrels and reproaches begin, partners move away from each other. Not territorially, but emotionally. A man stays late at work and goes with friends to a bar, and a woman with friends goes shopping and in a cafe. Conversations turn into solving everyday issues:
- Don't forget to take out the trash.
- And you - pay the bills.
Kisses when meeting and saying goodbye become at first on duty, and then disappear altogether. And so, the relationship seems to exist, but they do not bring happiness.
Why is this happening and can it be avoided?
Why do we need a pair relationship
A man is looking for a woman who inspires him. Relationships with the desired woman, the only and beloved, give a man energy and the ability to realize himself to the maximum in the social sphere. He achieves results and strives to develop in order to bring the fruits of his labor to her feet.
A woman in a pair relationship receives from a man a sense of security and protection, confidence in the future and, as a result, the desire to have a child. Better than two. This is a kind of foundation for a happy life for most women.
This concept of relationships seems pretty simple and straightforward. Then what violates it? Why do people who love each other experience dissatisfaction with relationships over time?
Two components of a happy relationship
The secret ingredient to a strong relationship is an emotional connection. When our innermost experiences, hopes for future success, dreams and plans - everything - we share together. This only arises on the basis of mutual trust. It is born gradually from our spiritual conversations, from our actions.
The second most important component of a happy relationship is mutual understanding. Not conditional: “do what you want”, but an inner deep understanding of the values and properties of your partner. Then blame and disappointment due to empty hopes are excluded.
It is often common for a person to expect from another that he can never give. For example, not everyone strives to build a career, not everyone wants to travel, sterile cleanliness in the house or unplugged lights in an empty room are optional. But when we sincerely understand the other, why he is exactly like that, then this does not cause negative reactions.
When a person looks forward to a future relationship, he focuses exclusively on the values that are in him. It is so arranged that people perceive the world and its phenomena through themselves and their sensations. Everyone around seems to think, feel and see the same way. And if someone, especially the chosen one of the heart, sees not so, then it is necessary to fix it. When the first passion subsides, claims, conditions and even ultimatums begin. And when a fish is made to fly, it will not become a bird, but only an unhappy fish.
Misunderstanding drives people apart. That is why it is important to understand yourself and also clearly understand your partner, so that everyone can become the best in their element.
Check out what happens to a couple where it seemed like divorce was inevitable when at least one partner was trained:
At this point, a question might have arisen: an article about relationships and not a word about love. But what about feelings, what about butterflies in the stomach?
To love = to act
Love is not "decorate my life, because I love you." This is an action that can be voiced as "I love and want happiness for you."
Love is expressed in how people manifest themselves in a couple: they only require attention to themselves, or they are focused on a partner. When a person loves, he gives all of himself to his partner: his care, his warmth, affection, time, achievements. He does everything in the name of love. Both man and woman.
It is important not to confuse the expression of genuine love with emotional pressure. In this case, it is not love that is built, but a dependent relationship. There is no happy side in such a couple. You can read more about emotional addiction in the article: "Symptoms of Passion or Love Addiction."
True love is mutual. This is the strongest relationship that will not be broken by any circumstances and third parties: mothers, girlfriends, colleagues. Because in such a relationship there is a unity of two. We call a couple halves not because they are not whole without a partner, but because they are whole in this relationship. This is the kind of connection that even outsiders feel. About such a couple they say that they have one soul for two. And indeed it is. Every day they give each other their love. They give - because it is free of charge, without expecting anything in return. The main desire of each partner is to please the other, to make him happy first. And the main reward is to see happiness in the eyes of the chosen one and feel it with your heart. And then this is happiness multiplied by two. And it is so much more than its own little pleasure.
Paired relationships that instead of joy and happiness bring dissatisfaction are not a sentence to parting. They can be updated and taken to the next level. The level of emotional closeness, and even spiritual unity, as the heroes of the following plot did: