Adaptation of children to school. To avoid excruciating pain
Most parents learn what a child's adaptation is when they have difficulty getting through it. The kid cannot get used to kindergarten in any way, cries, makes tantrums. The first grader does not want to go to school, he is afraid of his classmates. A fifth-grader, who was an excellent student in elementary school, suddenly falls into twos and threes.
Most parents learn what a child's adaptation is when they have difficulty getting through it. The kid cannot get used to kindergarten in any way, cries, makes tantrums. The first grader does not want to go to school, he is afraid of his classmates. A fifth-grader, who was an excellent student in elementary school, suddenly falls into twos and threes.
Such symptoms of unsuccessful adaptation of the child to the new environment, changed conditions, the requirements of society, the need to be independent sometimes lead to complete confusion of parents. Often they first try to get by with “home remedies” - they conduct a survey of acquaintances, collect information on the Internet and, using their own common sense, try to apply miraculous advice in practice.
If folk wisdom and someone else's successful experience did not help, but brought the situation even more to a dead end, then parents turn to professionals for human souls - psychologists, especially since they are in many educational institutions today. Just what do they offer as help to an unadapted child and his worried parents?
Knowledge is power
First, parents are told that the child's social adaptation is a necessary and natural stage in his development, so it must be experienced. To help the child, each educational institution develops a program for the adaptation of children.
Secondly, the terms of normal and abnormal adaptation of children are indicated - from 2-3 weeks to 6 months - within the framework of the norm, and if this time is not enough for the child, then you need to be wary.
Thirdly, the main factors of the social and psychological adaptation of children are called the prevailing nature of the child's relationship with the world around him, his individual characteristics, the degree of the child's preparedness for a new stage in his life, the type of educational institution, support of close people, the personality of educators.
There were difficulties with the adaptation of the child - you need to analyze each of these factors, find out what is falling. The main advice from psychologists and educators: love your children, engage in their upbringing and development.
It's easy to say.
Choking parental love
In practice, we often see very loving mothers who are everywhere trying to spread straws for their little one: “What kindergarten? There are only colds, fights, no intellectual development … Why are these unnecessary worries, why should the baby and his nerves spend on adaptation? It's better at home: delicious food, you can fully practice the methods of early development. However, if the kindergarten is optional, then secondary education is compulsory for Russian citizens.
And the issue of social adaptation will become relevant for a child not at preschool age, but later. At the same time, it is a known fact that children who did not attend kindergarten undergo social adaptation in the first grade is much more difficult than those who went, and at all stages of schooling: when entering the first grade, then when moving from primary school to middle classes and from middle to high school.
Why it is so important to undergo adaptation at an early preschool age and how effectively parents and teachers can help a child at this stage of his growing up, Yuri Burlan's System-Vector Psychology clearly explains.
Everything has its time
A child is born not as a blank board on which his caregivers can write whatever they want, but initially endowed with nature with certain properties (vectors), which are manifested in his type of thinking, demeanor, sense of life.
These innate abilities at the initial stage of a baby's development are at a basic level, like the psyche of a primitive man. The child has an important task - to realize and fill the natural potential throughout life. It should be noted that a child can develop vectors only in society, as well as become a person in the full sense of the word. It is important not to waste time in solving urgent problems at every stage of a child's growing up.
The lot of adults is to create optimal conditions for children to reveal their talents, for their successful socialization in society. So, at 4-5 years old, a baby should adapt to a group of peers, rank, understand his role in it. If a child has not developed the necessary social properties, then at a later age it is more difficult for him to do this: children see who is in the pack, and who is on his own, and often begins to persecute a loner. He becomes an outcast, because he does not know how to interact in a team, does not possess the necessary communication, self-regulatory skills.
System-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan proposes to help the child in adaptation, not using general methods of upbringing, universal advice, but precisely differentiating his mental characteristics.
If you understand what kind of child is in front of you, what motivates his actions, what he thinks about and what he wants, then with proper upbringing, problems with adaptation may not arise at all.
What our kids are made of
The adaptation is easiest for a child with a urethral vector. He is a small leader by his properties. He cannot imagine his life without a flock, his natural charisma contributes to the fact that other children follow him, they look up to him, they strive to get his favor.
Difficulties can arise in relationships with educators and teachers, if they put pressure on the urethral, talk to him from top to bottom, fight for power over the children's collective, then he will behave like a rebel and a notorious bully. Or if there is one more leader in the group, then they will divide the territory and sort things out "on the battlefield." Adults should negotiate with the urethral, appeal to his responsibility for the team.
A dermal child with a flexible psyche, an interest in everything new is able to quickly adapt to life changes, easily build relationships in a team, striving for leadership. Meanwhile, he can also quickly get bored, bored with going to kindergarten or school, if his interest is not strengthened. The leather worker is motivated to make an effort by the spirit of competition, competition - he wants to be the first, as well as material incentives.
Adaptation is most problematic in anal children, docile, calm, slow, meticulous, painfully perceiving any changes. Rigid psyche does not allow them to be as flexible as skinny ones, so parents need to prepare anal children for changes in advance, gradually immersing them in a new environment.
"A habit is given to us from above, it is a substitute for happiness for us." This is the anal principle. It is clear that at first he will argue, resist going to kindergarten, but feeling the support of his mother, her positive attitude and a firm decision, this, in fact, docile baby, in order to please his mother and receive the coveted praise, will go to the group. Once it comes off, two, three with a downcast head, but then, having mastered the space, getting used to educators, children, will begin to quietly attend kindergarten. If his friends are in the new team, for example, from the playground, this will greatly facilitate the adaptation of the anal child.
A kid with a sound vector, an introvert by nature, prefers to listen to silence, adaptation is difficult. It is difficult for him to get out of his shell into the outside world, but this is extremely necessary. Parents and teachers should support this child with a deep, childish look, quiet, even communication without shouts and unnecessary noise. The sound engineer should be given time so that he understands the information from the outside world and fulfills the request.
Visual kids are emotional, impressionable. How they adapt in kindergarten is often heard by all its visitors. They know how to throw tantrums, cry in bitter streams, emotionally manipulate adults: “You don't love me! Take me out of here! Spectators establish emotional ties with other people, for them it is very painful to break such ties, so parents have to convince them that nothing will change, they also love their child.
It is important to establish good relations with the educator, teacher. A friendly atmosphere helps viewers, extroverts by nature, to easily make contacts with other people. They are helped to adapt at the initial stage in kindergarten (until they have created new emotional connections) by taking their favorite plush toy with them.
The olfactory child shuns the collective, skillfully whines that he does not want to go to kindergarten, however, he must be encouraged to communicate, be firm in his intentions, and he successfully adapts.
Oral baby is happy to join the new team - here he discovers the opportunity to find free ears. Adaptation to school for such a child is easiest. He has a verbal intelligence, everything that is on his tongue is on his mind.
It should be noted that successful adaptation depends on the development of the lower vectors, which are filled only when the child communicates in a team. If parents develop the upper vectors responsible for intellectual development, to the detriment of the lower ones, then children remain non-adapters in society.
And let him have seven spans in his forehead, several higher educations, and there is no benefit to society from him, he cannot find a suitable job, since he has not learned to interact with people, while such a person will justify himself: “Only cattle works for such a salary”, With snobbery and arrogance to look at everyone around him, remaining deeply unhappy in his soul, with a aching feeling that he had not realized himself, had not achieved those heights that he could have reached.
Common myths about adaptation
I would like to consider systematically the most common misconceptions about the adaptation of children.
1. "The success of a child's adaptation to school is manifested in the fact that he copes with the curriculum."
Good grades are not an indicator of successful adaptation to a group of peers, since they show the level of mastery of certain knowledge, skills, and educational skills. The level of intelligence development and the developed communication, social skills are different things.
For example, let's take an anal boy with sound and vision. From childhood, his mother brought up only the upper qualities in him, he did not learn to stand firmly on the ground, and so he clings to an indecisive anality that does not know how to break through in life, sound and vision also add shyness and weakness.
The innate properties of a child, of course, can be developed, he will work "for himself", create masterpieces within four walls, but no one will know about it, the fruits of his work will not be in demand, and he himself will be no one and nowhere … Typical non-adaptant. “He's so smart, but he can't solve simple everyday issues without a mother,” - this is how they usually say about anal children who have not adapted to the landscape. A bad mother is who, after such upbringing, will not feed her son until retirement.
2. "The child's satisfaction with the learning process, the absence of fears is an indicator of successful adaptation."
Adaptation lies not in the area of training, but in the area of the child's social education. The acquisition of communication skills by children, samples of socially acceptable behavior, the acquisition of social status are possible only with full interaction in a team. This is facilitated by extracurricular activities, school-wide holidays, and sports team competitions. How active is the child in public life? What role does he play in the class: leader, leader, "workhorse"? Here is one of the main indicators of adaptation in school.
If we talk about the fears of schoolchildren, then it is worth understanding their basis. Fear is inherent in the visual vector. Its presence tells us not that the child has adapted poorly to school, but that his visual vector is not full, not developed. Until a certain time, it is quite normal that a visual child is afraid of the dark or walking past a cemetery. This is a call to parents that it is worth protecting the child from watching horror films, not intimidating him with scary stories with a fatal ending, but developing compassion and empathy for other people in him.
3. "A sign of successful adaptation is the degree of the child's independence in learning."
Self-fulfillment of exercises in mathematics or the Russian language is also an indicator of the level of assimilation of knowledge and the child's ability for independent intellectual work, self-discipline, and the desire to learn. Fostering independence in children is certainly necessary.
However, the adaptation of children to school is their desire to communicate with teachers, peers, the ability to independently interact with the team, to be adapted to life, for example, to be able to dress independently, collect a portfolio, and eat carefully.
4. “The most difficult thing in the adaptation of children in grade 5 is the transition from one, habitual teacher, to interaction with several teachers.”
This fear is characteristic of anal children who fall into a stupor in the face of the unknown. Teachers should sort out their requirements and criteria for assessment on the shelves, so that anal excellent students, as they say, feel better.
5. “The ease of adaptation of children in the camp depends on the characteristics of their character, temperament and upbringing. For faster and more painless habituation to the camp, it is desirable that the child be able to independently establish interpersonal contacts with peers and maintain them."
Indeed, the passage of adaptation of children in the camp, a kind of school of life, depends on their innate vectors, the degree of their development and fullness. It is noticed that adaptation is carried out most quickly through the upbringing of children in activities (for example, work, play). Everyone can feel like a part of the whole. The child finds his place in the new team, which means that the adaptation was successful.
So, the process of adaptation of children is vital for the future. How firmly the new generation will stand on its feet, how ready it will be to work together, how much everyone will be ready to make their own contribution to the common cause, ultimately depends on the happiness of each individual child and our society as a whole.
