School yard for the future emperor. How much are children's games for adult life ?
Leaving their child "at home", in the care of a computer and TV, many modern parents do him a disservice. No matter how much you want to protect your child from any dangers, you need to temper him from childhood - otherwise he will be completely unadapted to the next life.
Home education of a child is becoming a common phenomenon today. No yard, no street, all friends are checked by parents, plus vigilant control using the latest technical innovations. Parents motivate this with seemingly simple and completely understandable reasons: firstly, the child will be safe, and secondly, he will always have good company, “there will be no bad things,” “he will study well,” and so on. "What can the yard give him?" "Teach smoking, swear words, fights and breaking glass?" It seems that everything is logical, and the less time the child spends in the yard, the more he is left for useful things: reading, studying, helping parents …
However, Yuri Burlan at the training "System-vector psychology" gives us an exact understanding that to deprive a child of an adequate team, not to let him participate in yard battles means to seriously limit his development.
Not all children are the same
Each person contains one or more of the eight so-called vectors, upper or lower. The upper vectors responsible for intelligence are optional, but at least one of the lower ones that provide libido is always present. And if the upper vectors - sound, visual, olfactory, oral - are not so strongly influenced by yard upbringing: it is quite possible to read books, embroider with a cross and play the piano at home, but for the lower vectors it turns out to be vital - otherwise the child simply will not be able to adapt to adulthood.
This is a prerequisite not only for humans, but also for any living being. Even puppies and kittens play catch-up or "hunt" with each other. These games are simplified life scenarios. Girls should play as mothers and daughters, as a doctor, as a model, as a hostess, boys as robber Cossacks, squares, tags … Such courtyard “activities” are necessary for children at least from three years old, because only they teach adaptation skills in the adult world.
It will be much more difficult for someone who hasn't played enough in the framework of this small model of life in the yard to adapt in adult life, where the games of young children turn into no less predictable adult relationships.
Leaving your child at home deprives him of the necessary development. Today it turns out that the child begins to spend more and more time at the computer, playing virtual games that have nothing to do with natural human development.
This is said, of course, in a simplified way, and in fact, everything is much more complicated. Each vector in life and in the yard manifests itself in its own way. A child is a small animal with primitive desires, and therefore ranking by vectors on the street in pre-adolescence is especially clear and visual. In the yard (read - in the kindergarten, in the classroom, in the school), a kind of archetypal society gathers, where everyone finds their niche: from the urethral to the skin, muscle and anal.
I will try to at least briefly describe why such upbringing is important for a child with any type of lower vector (that is, for any child in general: people without lower vectors simply do not exist).
For example, a urethral child is a small leader of the court, a pioneer, a bully.
He chooses his own path, leads a young "flock" with him and will not give offense to small subordinates: he needs someone to admire him, he needs someone to give direction. A garden, a street, a school - any children's collective - just gives an opportunity to develop the properties of a real leader, to learn responsibility for the fate of others, to direct your enormous energy into the right direction. Any restriction of the urethral is unacceptable and will not be successful either on the part of teachers or on the part of parents. It is useless to lock him at home - he will escape one way or another, because he cannot live without the pack. In the case of especially strict parents, it can even start a fire at home as a protest. Together with the court, the urethral child is a powerful king, without a court - a desperate wanderer. Only a society of other children can instill in the urethral a sense of responsibility, make it clear that everything depends only on his own decisions.
A slightly different situation with the carrier of the anal vector. If a kid is naturally obedient, not particularly decisive, measured, diligent and very greedy for praise, then he certainly has this lower vector. This is a child at home, a future guard of the cave (that is, in our time at home and family). However, even he needs a healthy yard upbringing to develop communication skills. Otherwise, one of two evils can happen. Either the libido that struck at the beginning of puberty, to which the child is not normally adapted, as in other vectors during puberty, “blows his mind,” and he (or she) goes all out, or, on the contrary, a socially unadapted 27-year-old a virgin, sufficiently developed from above, but not able to control his lower properties. It is unlikely that at least one parent wishes his child a similar fate.
For a skin child, mobile, capable of dancing, able to feel the time, economical and at the same time, in the case of undeveloped, thieving, the yard is in no way less important than for children with a different vector set.
In case of non-adaptation to the conditions of the modern world, the boy turns out to be a drunkard, pickpocket, kleptomaniac, masochist, and from a girl - a prostitute, an ardent shopaholic or the wife of an anal sadist, suffering regular humiliation and beatings. Parents are not able to give solutions to all life scenarios, the child must learn to find them on his own - and for the leatherman, with his potential leadership qualities, his desire and ability to climb to the top of the social ladder, communication with peers in the flock in the pre-adolescent period is one of the keys to success. The child must learn self-control, learn to overcome material, space and time constraints. You can't learn this at home with your parents. The most that relatives can do is to stroke him on the back more often,try to teach discipline and carefully financially reward for the successes achieved (even if at school he will study even worse than some anal Mishutka).
Well, there is nothing to say about the muscle. If you have at least read an article about the muscle vector, then you understand that without a pack, uniting in "us", they are nowhere: they need a commander, they need a leader, they need a group. They need to be measured against strength, to have someone to guide them - be it a urethral leader, a skin commander, or an anal educator. You need to be very careful when choosing a yard company for such a child, because the muscles adopt the values of the one they follow. So friendship with an archetypal leather thief or a little sadistic anal sex brings nothing useful, to put it mildly. A muscle man cannot be sent to sports sections, otherwise he will forever remain in a military state, will be a recruit in the underworld, will fight and kill. He needs to be initiated in work, taught to help mom and dad - for such a kid this is the best and most natural "vaccination" against crime. But in any case, without a collective "we", without a brigade, a group or a muscle class, it seems as if it does not exist - therefore, it is by no means possible to limit it from society.
And so it turns out: the urethral leader leads the group to exploits, the skinners collect trophies, the anal sexes cover the rear, and the muscles provide them all with physical strength and hold the group together with their unity. And all this is true not only for boys: in the absence of a urethral in the yard, it may well be replaced by an urethral girl, leading a group of lovers and loyal guys to her.
Some upper vectors do not develop well without full-fledged yard conditions.
For example, the oral needs an audience, and neither parents nor relatives have enough strength to constantly listen to "his chatter." But how the classmates rejoice at these stories! It is the oralist who comes up with nicknames for the whole court, which are attached for life, it is he who is the main inventor of the collective. And even if he is a clown for teachers, this is the only way that a new Zhvanetsky, Guberniev, can later grow out of him, and at the peak of his development - a great orator like Fidel Castro. As the oral Zhirinovsky says to himself, "you all turn to reason, and I - to instinct." And the development of instinct happens best in the right conditions.
An older friend of any oralist, a silent and melancholic olfactory person, does not like people in principle. His only desire is for melancholy, and if it were his will, he would not leave the house at all. However, his main task by nature is to survive, and it is in society that this needs to be learned. The olfactory person, despite his reluctance, needs to be pushed into collectives, given to sections, sent to school. In no case should he be overprotected - this can lead to a life scenario dangerous for the olfactory child. A team with all the intricacies and threats is the only place where a small olfactory person is able to develop.
Those who really have a hard time in the yard are the dermal-visual boys, gentle, sensitive, with tears ready to splash at any moment. “Well, just like a girl,” they say about them. Such future Plushenko, Kirkorovs, Bilans, Galkins and Presnyakovs. They easily succumb to fear and most often in childhood they are friends with the same skin-visual girls. They even play "girlish" games - they can plait pigtails and dress up dolls, while the rest of the boys run around with the robber Cossacks. But even such a society is much better than none. A slightly fearful, beautiful, cutesy, mannered, flirtatious and emotional child should be sent to ballroom dancing, or even better, so that his eyesight develops in him, and not skin - in some theatrical circle. Skin-visual boy feels good in baking or singing mugs,in the society of girls, feeling like a boy against their background (and not a "girl" against the background of boys). There he will be the most fashionable and handsome young man, with whom the entire female half of the team will secretly fall in love. But at the isolated house of a skin-visual boy, his most basic feeling - inner fear - will develop more and more. Even if you don’t scare him, don’t read fairy tales to him or show him films with a bad ending.you will not read him fairy tales or show him films with a bad ending.you will not read him fairy tales or show him films with a bad ending.
Of course, there are also dangers. At the age of 6, children have their first sexual interest!
Boys are curious about girls, stratification of friends begins: everyone (except for the skin-visual) tries to be friends with individuals of the same sex. Questions unexpected for parents appear, active ranking starts in the yard, and everyone begins to look for their place and determine their rank in the pack. The first fights take place, the first falls in love are experienced. But these are absolutely normal phenomena, and you need to treat them very sensibly, supporting your child in the first battles for a place in the sun and at the same time allowing him to take independent steps along this path.
Leaving their child "at home", in the care of a computer and TV, many modern parents, without realizing it, do him a huge disservice. It's like misophobia - the fear of dirt and germs - that makes some individuals afraid to go outside. As a result, without collision with real conditions, human immunity weakens, and the body experiences shocks from the slightest load. No matter how much you want to protect your child from any dangers, you need to temper him from childhood - otherwise he will be completely unadapted to the next life.
Read about the archetypal behavior of each of the vectors in the library of the portal: children exactly follow this program laid down in them, so that no matter what happens to your child, having studied system-vector psychology at the training, you will understand it and can not harm, but help. In fact, it's amazing how often we only need to slightly change our point of view in order to make our child happy.
