How not to overeat: my crazy love is on the plate
There are psychological reasons for overeating. Few people realize the trigger mechanism for the breakdowns from proper nutrition to overeating. Once you figure out what triggers the over-enjoyment of food, gluttony simply isn't necessary.
Evening. Cinema. Delicious grilled chicken. I transfer it to a large Italian glass plate. Fork on the left, knife on the right. Summer vegetable salad seasoned with fragrant oil tossed with a large wooden spoon. Olives and smoked cheese for starters. For dessert - Napoleon. God, how delicious! How not to overeat here? I wash it down with tea with lemon, it is hotly poured over the contented body. I stretch out on the couch and squeak with pleasure.
Twenty minutes. Then I run after Mezim. At night I suffer from feelings of guilt and heaviness in my stomach. And in the morning I cry over weights and trousers that cut into my hips. And so every weekend.
For five days I have been doing great on proper nutrition, working out in the gym. And on Saturday, the breakdown is like an abyss, like a forbidden lover.
What was in Vegas is not left in Vegas
At some point, I realized that I was having a secret affair with food. I wait for my parents to take the twins to their place, buy goodies, turn on a preselected movie, put my phone away and … enjoy myself. More precisely from the belly. Just me and dinner, the two of us and no one else. This is our Vegas.
Food has become my cult. More meaningful than the opportunity to spend time with children or close in the bedroom with your beloved man.
Even after a party with friends or a romantic evening, I need to be alone and eat. Literally shaking. This is the only way to rest.
There is no talk of stress seizing here. When I'm stressed, on the contrary, a piece does not go down my throat. I want to smoke or knock over a glass of sour.
I didn't notice the problem until my relationship with food took a toll on my weight. Ten kilograms, then another ten and, oh my God, again plus ten. From a slender girl I turned into a quite weighty woman.
Gluttony makes me feel dirty, fallen, committing a crime. And I eat again, eating up this disgusting impression, spicing up the dinner with sodium chloride dripping from my eyes.
Fasting doesn't help you lose weight. Weight only grows, even from water.
Where did the failure occur?
I didn't feel like I was eating too much. The belly party was only on the weekend. I thought it was a malfunction in the body.
I went to an endocrinologist, he referred to a gastroenterologist, the latter to a neurologist, and the latter to a psychologist.
The psychologist suggested loving yourself. Love? I can't even look in the mirror at this aunt in oversized sweaters and a double chin!
Unfortunately, endocrine problems on the scale of thirty pounds gained have not been confirmed. Gastroenterological - only as a consequence of the use of salted and smoked, seasoned with balsamic vinegar.
God, I hoped that the reason for my weight gain was high sugar levels or off-scale acidity in the stomach! The doctor will give the medicine - and everything will pass.
But I had to admit that food addiction is about me.
My thoughts are consumed with food. I plan carefully what I will buy, how to cook, cover and eat. I get angry when I lose the opportunity to observe the ritual of solitary absorption. Three-quarters of my expenses are shopping at gourmet stores and farmers' markets. I am ready to agree, lie, even shrug off the clouds, just to be alone with the movie and the meal. I hide my passion from others or talk only about the bright side of my culinary talent and have a reputation for being a great hostess. At the same time, the state of mind is basement, the physical one is bloated.
I just cannot, I have forgotten how to enjoy in another way.
Food is the answer to unrequited love
Why do I only want food as the ultimate pleasure? After all, I remember evenings when I left a cooked dinner and lighted candles on the table and pounced on my beloved with kisses right there, at the table. And so we were already lying in the bedroom, out of breath and wet. We looked at the dark ceiling with the reflection of the headlights of cars passing through the yard and talked about something. About what? Just chirped. Burned with passion again. Then we fell asleep. In the morning, I cleaned the crumbs of forgotten candles from the countertop and scattered the abandoned dinner in containers. There was not even a thought about how I should not overeat at night.
At what point did the body's feast from the absorption of food become stronger than the soul's delight from the feeling of infinity with a loved one?
As a child, I was given candy to calm down. Dad brought a chocolate bar from work, and I felt how he loved me.
Apparently, it happened that candy-chocolates, cucumbers-chickens just replaced love.
A plate with a delicacy will not drive away, will not deceive, will not betray, will not change and … will not stop loving. Food is not afraid to confess your love, because she will not reject.
The first ten kilos crept up unnoticed when at romantic dinners with my husband it became more pleasant for me to enjoy delicacies than intimacy. Running to the bedroom and back to the table to finish off the pomegranate and truffle. And everything seemed to be fine, but talking, embracing in the dark, was no longer so tempting.
The second ten - within a month after the divorce. There was not much grief. I got through the breakup quite calmly. I licked my wounds and somehow imperceptibly began to spend time on dates with dinner. We had home movies with food. It was true love in return. Again, I didn't want to part … With a plate, a jar of olives, a box of mascarpone.
Third ten. Already now, when I realized that I do not want a relationship with a man. And who will fall for a fat woman without mood. And evenings at the table still give their meager dose of happiness, seasoned with remorse and a bloated stomach.
The reason for overeating
There is one of the highest pleasures. Double pleasure. Starting from voluptuousness on the papillae of the tongue and to satiated satisfaction. It gives a lasting sense of security and safety until it's time to hunt for a new mammoth. "I am full, now I am not afraid to die." Brain biochemistry is being balanced. The body receives a signal that everything is fine.
According to recent studies by neuroscientists, one hundred million nerve cells between the intestine and the esophagus create the so-called intestinal brain. He constantly interacts with the brain, including the exchange of feelings and emotions. It is the presence of its own neural network that allows the intestines to work, even if communication with the brain and spinal cord is lost.
"Intestinal" and the brain are in continuous communication, as communicating vessels. What happens in one is in the other. Excitement, fear, anxiety affect in a known way the work of the sphincters of the gastrointestinal tract, spasming or relaxing them. The first is full - the second is also full. The hole in one is balanced by the overflow of the other.
Remember how you forgot to eat when you were in love and your soul was filled with endless joy. Butterflies fluttered in my stomach.
If the sensual connection that fills us with happiness, confidence, inspiration, disappears - emptiness is formed. We just have to fill it out. Otherwise we will die of emotional hunger.
No way to fill the hole with spiritual food? We fill it with food - after all, the vessels communicate. The wider the hole in the soul, the more food we need. And not just any horrible one, but tasty, sweet, tart, spicy. To eat for a long time, with relish, prolonging the hours of pleasure. Otherwise, death from falling into the bottomless abyss of mental pain.
But the problem is that the mental hole cannot be covered with physical branches with a kebab.
The emotional hole continues to grow, demanding more and more food in its crucible. It is more than addiction. Nothing can be done about it until you realize the cause. And you don't have to force yourself not to overeat.
What does it mean to love yourself
Home psychologists advise to love yourself, and then you will not want to eat. Or, even worse, love yourself at your current weight.
Take a closer look - it is self-love that makes you eat. If you did not love yourself, you would long ago allow yourself to perish from the gap in the chest left by betrayal, betrayal, lies, unrequited feelings and unfulfilled promises. Overeating is a cure for emotional death for you. Only the process of absorbing food gives reason to rejoice.
There are other tips:
eating tasteless / unflavored food,
- use ugly dishes,
- sniff and not eat,
- buy flowers instead of food,
- cut portions in half.
It's like kissing a guy who, when he gets to a crucial moment, will run home. And the guy is unsightly, cut in half, but at least some. You can not real, but lick a photo or a cardboard mannequin. Nice but safe. Some kind of execution.
I am offered to aggravate my pain by depriving myself of the only pleasure that I experience.
Laws of soul and body
The body and mind work in the opposite way.
The body first receives, then gives. Inhale, exhale. The psyche first gives and only then receives. Made a gift - you rejoice from gratitude, put in effort - enjoy the result.
That is, the psyche is filled with giving from oneself, and not receiving into oneself. This is easy to understand. For example, the endless joy that trembles in the knees that we experience when we love someone is quite different from the satisfaction, and sometimes indifference, from knowing that the other person loves us.
Enjoying the on-screen life of movie characters paired with food, we create a surrogate for filling our souls with feelings. Screen novel and dinner. Isn't it a real date?
But at the same time, the psyche is not filled, since it does not give anything to a living person. A hole in the soul is growing, and only creating relationships with people will help to fill the void.
Living is delicious
The human psyche has several “cells” for different emotional connections.
Tenderness for children and parents, sincere feelings for a man, friendship, compassion for acquaintances and strangers, mutual assistance and help.
We can fill some cells and leave others blank. As if we want to eat, but instead we drink. The feeling of hunger persists.
When each of the cells of the psyche is filled with its own "food", you can not overeat while eating. The pleasure of eating will not disappear anywhere, it will become of a different quality. At the table with loved ones, long conversations and happy laughter.
To learn not to overeat, you need to take just two steps:
- Find which "cell" of the soul is hungry.
- Understand how you can enjoy your psyche through connections with people.
And no ugly plates with bad food.
To make these two steps easy and safe, come to the free training sessions "System-vector psychology" by Yuri Burlan. This is psychoanalysis, which will allow you to understand all the most intimate about yourself and others, and this means - to realize and get rid of the traumas lurking in the unconscious that prevent you from enjoying life and creating relationships. And it also means - to feel forgotten lightness and ardent desire, and most importantly, the ability to live in full force. Taste it and get your results, as thousands of trainees have already done. You do not lose anything except the heaviness in the stomach and extra pounds.
Ekaterina Gusarova lost 30 kg in 5 months and does not deny herself anything: Doctor's opinion:>