One Life Draft or What is Dissatisfaction?
We live our life, taking it as a rough draft. While rehearsing the upcoming premiere of the future, we seem to skip the present. Every day we seem to compromise with ourselves, simultaneously convincing ourselves that in fact this is the best option for today …
Endless rehearsal of life, or How powerless we are before fate
Have you ever felt like you are living half-heartedly? As if being in constant expectation of a favorable coincidence of circumstances, a feeling of finding the right moment, every day putting off something important for later.
We live our life, taking it as a rough draft. While rehearsing the upcoming premiere of the future, we seem to skip the present. Every day we seem to compromise with ourselves, along the way convincing ourselves that in fact this is the best option for today.
Job. It seems to be good, sometimes even interesting, important and even necessary for someone, the salary is normal. Yes, I would like more, but what can you do, you have to live on something. Well, the head of the tyrant, they, apparently, now, all are like that, well, the projects are too small, you can't really turn around, and if you think about it, this work is annoying, annoying. What is there to do?
On the personal front, it is also somehow incomprehensible. It seems that a relationship is being established, but very quickly I understand that it is not mine. Here is the wrong person next to you, that's all. I just feel it - we cannot live together, they are too different, or, on the contrary, very similar. I don't know why, but the relationship breaks down on its own, as if the person also understands that I am not what he is looking for.
So it was with my husband - a kind of compromise. Of all the candidates, although there were not so many of them, to be honest, he turned out to be the most suitable. Not ideal, of course, but what to do? It's time to get married, the parents are waiting for their grandchildren, and they wanted some kind of comfort, family life. I thought we’ll get used to it. So, we are still grinding in … so we never became family. He has work, friends, sports, endless business trips, I have my own life - work, children, home. Well, this is the case for everyone now, I guess. Time is like that.
There are not even many friends - so, friends, acquaintances, colleagues, neighbors. We meet, communicate, joke, go somewhere, but so as to call someone a real friend … I don't even know if there is such a person.
We see our parents on weekends or holidays. They have everything as usual, the old record - endless memories, complaints and moralizing about how to live correctly, how to raise children, how to take care of elders and the like.
In general, I have the most ordinary life, the average, so to speak, in it every day is similar to the previous one. I no longer know what can make me happy or upset, strongly excite or inspire me. Not everyone is destined to be stars, someone just has to pull their own strap of fate. That's how I drift with the flow of life, but sometimes I really want to flare up even for a moment …
Dissatisfaction with our life often leads us to a dead end. The feeling of incomplete realization, as if events happen by themselves, and life floats by day after day without our intervention, gives rise to a feeling of powerlessness, a kind of senselessness of existence, doom.
It seems to us that all desires fade, past dreams are erased from memory or no longer cause the old awe. We do not set ourselves any goals just to avoid swallowing another batch of frustration when the goal is not achieved. And we know in advance that this will happen. Why try if it doesn't work anyway?
The state of dissatisfaction cannot be called particularly painful, it is felt not as acutely and negatively as obvious psychological problems, but, continuing for a long time, it turns into a kind of life background, drawing internal pain, like from an old wound. It turns into a significant psychological barrier, reducing the quality of human life and limiting his potential.
Who decides: who - to burn, and who - to smolder?
What's the matter? Why do we all have such different fates? Someone from birth knows, just sure of what he will devote his life to, and someone is not able to decide for many years what he likes. One meets the love of his life and realizes it right off the bat, while the other half of his life is searching and never finds his soul mate. Someone lives every day so inspirational and rich that they can easily consider it the last, while someone just pulls the day until the evening to start anew in the morning.
It is easy and bright for those lucky ones who fully understand what they want from life, clearly see their goals, realize their desires and every day make their dreams come true, plunging headlong into their favorite work, enjoying sincere relationships, getting great pleasure from communicating with friends and close and simply enjoying every moment of their life.
How to become such a person? To be born again, to reformat the head, to change the occupation, the country?
Is there a chance for an ordinary gray mouse, which is no different from the same mice from the crowd, to learn to live a little more joyfully, a little brighter, a little happier, a little richer? And this is at a time when there are no special talents, outstanding abilities are not observed, there have never been grandiose plans, and there has never been a desire to turn the world upside down.
Maybe in this case, you shouldn't tear the veins? Born to crawl cannot fly …
How do you know? He may not be able to fly, but he is very capable of living and enjoying this fact!
The psychology of happiness works the same for everyone
If you look at it, the very feeling of satisfaction or dissatisfaction with life is a psychological state that can be either positive or negative. It all depends on the level of development and the degree of realization of innate psychological properties.
Each of these properties strives to be fulfilled during life, each desire requires its realization, feeling negative until the moment when we do not satisfy our need. The full realization of psychological properties is felt as pleasure, a consequence of the perfectly balanced biochemistry of the brain. We feel joy, fulfillment, meaningfulness of life, happiness.
However, part of our properties, sometimes a fairly large part of them, remains unconscious for us, and therefore does not receive sufficient fulfillment. The satisfaction of desire still occurs, but not completely, not in full force. We seem to realize ourselves, but something is missing. Everything seems to be fine, but not as we would like. The condition seems to be not critical, but there is no joy, no happiness, feelings of enthusiasm, passion, inspiration - they are not.
Due to the lack of awareness of desires, lack of understanding of our own psyche, we are simply lost in search of goals. The groping path gives only partial realization, and hence partial satisfaction. That's how we live - halfway through, neither good nor bad, but somehow.
Attempts to blindly find your happiness, to make your life a little more joyful, a little richer, a little better have a very dubious effectiveness.
A modern man is born with such a great power of desire in each vector that the partial realization of psychological properties feels more and more painful to him, forcing, simply pushing him to search for any way to fill the gaping voids. Without a clear understanding of psychological processes, the needs of our “I”, the reasons for our dissatisfaction in the state of search, we come across only the most primitive ways to realize our desires.
For example, there is a need for emotions, and she, like any other, yearns for her satisfaction. The easiest and most affordable way to fill this shortage is to provoke a home scandal or a showdown at work with a showdown. There is always a reason, isn't there? We had a scandal, experienced an emotional shake-up, performed in the theater of one actor - we received a release, a kind of satisfaction. But! How complete is it? This is the most primitive level for a complex modern personality. And as a quite expected consequence - in a few days we repeat our concert. The property requires its filling, receives only a small part and requires it again and again. It does not disappear anywhere, but begins to live by us, to guide our thoughts, actions, words.
To understand the systemic essence of the visual vector means to know the nature of all emotions, to be aware of and observe in oneself all the stages of the development of our feelings: from fear for oneself to an all-embracing love for another. Such a deep and clear vision of one's own emotional sphere makes past helpless attempts to fill an empty well with a spoonful of water downright ridiculous.
Consciously directing our sensory impulses to others, shifting the point of application of emotions from “look at me” to “take mine”, we are able to fill the need of the visual vector to the maximum, getting real pleasure from what we are doing, and not just temporary satisfaction.
The very process of giving up emotions is the way that can fill our need for emotional connection. Compassion, emotional involvement in the misfortune of another, the desire and desire to help, sympathize, share his grief with someone, relieve suffering - fillings of this level completely sweep away even the thought of scandalizing, throwing a tantrum or sorting out a relationship for any reason. The very need for such a low way of manifesting oneself disappears.
It is in this connection that systemic thinking in the categories of psychology of a new model for a modern person acquires special significance. This is what many trained people say in their interviews on the reviews page. Without a clear question to be solved, or an obvious psychological problem, people came to the training just to better understand themselves and those around them, and received a result that exceeded their wildest expectations.
Understanding one's own needs of the psyche opens up the widest possibilities for the realization of innate properties for any person. Even without the highest level of development, each of us becomes able to express ourselves as much as possible, to realize all the unused potential of our capabilities and to bring it to life, feeling, perhaps for the first time, the filling of such power, which is capable of giving a feeling of joy, happiness, self-satisfaction, self-satisfaction. life and work.
And, as always, the choice is yours.
You can continue to live half-heartedly, put up with a state of dissatisfaction, make endless compromises with yourself, or you can try to unravel the tight ball of your desires, finally figure out what has prevented you from living all these years to the fullest, and try to make your life a little more comfortable, a little more joyful, a little happier than before.
Now you can.
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