Why does my child steal. Proper parenting methods
When a child is born in a family, parents want the best for him and do everything to make him a worthy member of society, to be wealthy and happy. The problem of child stealing seems so distant and certainly not related to our child that, when faced with this fact for the first time, we are often shocked. "How so? What am I missing? What did you do wrong? Why did my child start stealing?"
It so happens that even in a completely prosperous family with wealth, the child is prone to theft. The first reaction of the parents is to flog so that it is discouraging. “What a shame! My son steals from me, a respected person. I have not taken a stranger's penny in my life! The second is a feverish search for a solution, up to trips to a child psychologist.
In this article we will try to look at the problem of child theft from the perspective of the latest developments in psychology.
Thief from birth
At the training "System-vector psychology" Yuri Burlan reveals that each of us is born with a given set of properties, desires and abilities. The sets of these properties are called vectors. There are only 8 vectors, each with its own potential, with its own range of development - from the most primitive, archetypal, to the most adapted and adequate to the modern world. We are born archetypal and evolve into our opposite.
For example, a child with a visual vector is born fearful - this is how nature arranged that the most primitive role of the spectator was once to notice danger and be afraid. With proper development, the visual child develops into its opposite - learns to fear not for himself and his life, but for others - to empathize and sympathize with other people. When a spectator focuses all his emotions outside on other people, he completely breaks away from fear for himself and becomes fearless. These were the nurses of the Great Patriotic War.
The same thing happens in every vector. If your child is hyperactive, calms down when he is stroked on the head, back, has an athletic physique, likes to be cunning and has enough of everything, then he was born with a skin vector. And the primitive role of the leatherback is to extract, and to extract more than enough, but in the future he learns to compensate for this by limitation.
A small child "skinner" is archetypal: he wants to take everything that is bad, he gets it as he can. In a word, he steals. When such a child develops correctly, he limits his desire, creates the law “do not take without demand,” and finds other ways of extraction - by saving time, energy, and resources.
It is incredible, but it is a fact - they do not become thieves, they remain in the absence of normal conditions for development. A small skin child is not a thief, it is a primitive breadwinner who does what he knows how to do. It is important to teach him to do it differently, developing the properties given to him from birth.
Thieves big and small
Any child develops only when he feels a sense of security and safety. He basically gets this feeling from his parents. Loss of a sense of security and safety over a short distance can lead to occasional theft, and over a long distance can lead to stable conditions.
People with a skin vector have very sensitive skin, a very low pain threshold. They were slightly hit, and they were already in great pain. Painful effects on the skin in the case of a skin child lead to a loss of a sense of security and safety. And then the child tries to preserve himself on his own, but he does not have such a skill. And he does it the way he can - in an early, archetypal way, like a getter: he takes without asking, without restriction - he steals.
If such a child is constantly beaten, he stops developing. Since adults do not protect him, he early takes responsibility for survival on himself, tries to survive with his undeveloped properties. That is, by applying physical punishment to a child, parents achieve the exact opposite effect - he stops in his development, and a fraud, a swindler, not limited by a ban, a law grows up. The beaten leatherman thinks small - where to steal something, who to deceive, to sniff something, how to "cut down the grandmother."
The mother's conditions also have a significant impact on the child - when she feels bad, she herself does not feel safe, this is transmitted directly to the child. It can also cause theft from the little skin. The mother's condition changes - the child also changes for the better, becomes calmer, more balanced. Often, parents who have completed the training sessions "System-Vector Psychology" by Yuri Burlan note that the child stops stealing. For example, here's how Anna talks about it:
By understanding the characteristics of the child, you can easily get rid of the problem of theft. You can better understand what kind of approach your child needs at Yuri Burlan's free online lectures. You can sign up at the link:
