My husband asks for a child, but I don't want to. What to do?
In fact, a woman’s reluctance to have children is not uncommon. To solve this problem, you do not need to persuade anyone or accuse anyone of inferiority, but you need to figure out the real reason why a woman in a happy marriage does not want to give birth. And then she herself will decide what to do. The training "System-vector psychology" by Yuri Burlan will help us in this.
Hello! I'm 29 and I don't want kids. I am not selfish, I treat children well, they don’t irritate me, but I don’t want my own children. Even one. It may not be right, but I don’t want to lose myself and lose the life that I have.
Everything would be fine, but my husband, with whom we had a great relationship before, seriously wanted a child. On the one hand, I don't want to lose my husband. On the other hand, maybe I'm not normal, but I don't want a child.
A child is, to begin with, pregnancy, childbirth, and then - a completely different life under the motto "everything for the child." I love being alone, meeting friends, traveling, reading books, going to work, after all. And the child is guaranteed to deprive me of all this, and I am scared to cease to belong to myself!
And further. Now I cannot relax, because I am afraid of getting pregnant. And our relationship is getting worse every day.
Help, I'm stumped. Can this problem be solved somehow?"
In fact, a woman’s reluctance to have children is not uncommon. To solve this problem, you do not need to persuade anyone or accuse anyone of inferiority, but you need to figure out the real reason why a woman in a happy marriage does not want to give birth. And then she herself will decide what to do. The training "System-vector psychology" by Yuri Burlan will help us in this.
The psyche of all people is arranged in different ways, but there are some common features among women who do not want children. This is the presence of sound and / or visual vectors in certain combinations and states. If a woman is the owner of cutaneous, anal, visual and sound vectors, then internal contradictions can be very strong.
Too smart to have kids
Woman with sound vector. The questions that torment her are not always clear to those around her. Questions about the meaning of life, about the origin of everything. It is like a box with a double bottom: everything is simple on the outside, but there is always some kind of mystery inside. She seems to be constantly looking for an answer to some dumb question. Looks for him in science, philosophy, psychology, esotericism, religious teachings, travel, again in psychology … Her feminine nature, all this physiology, often interferes with her, distracts and does not allow her to focus on the main thing.
Children? What for? What is the point of having a child if he will constantly demand attention to himself and distract him from inner reflections? The standard female set of three Ks - Kirche, Kuche, Kinder - is disgusting because it seems pointless.
Earlier, when the volume of the female psyche was not so large, the sound request of a woman could be filled with religion, music or some kind of scientific direction, and then the birth of children did not cause such internal protest. Now a woman with a sound vector needs much more. Sometimes these unconscious inner searches come to a dead end, and do not achieve a result. She may have a real sound depression, when suffering becomes unbearable and she wants to finally get out of this accursed body to where the "eternal sunshine of the pure mind" …
Well, what kind of children are there?
Too pretty
There is another category of women who do not represent themselves as mothers. Although children, as a rule, adore them and they are the best teachers and educators in the world, as well as actresses. But the very thought of pregnancy and childbirth in such women causes unaccountable fear. These are women with visual-cutaneous ligament vectors.
The optic cutaneous ligament gives such mental features as tremendous emotionality, sensitivity, artistry, the ability to find a common language with any person and … the inability to give birth. Seducing and not giving birth, skin-visual woman from time immemorial accompanied men in war and hunting, inspired them to heroic deeds, bandaged wounds. And after the war she raised children - strangers, since she could not have her own.
She has no animal maternal instinct as she has never given birth historically. Therefore, now, when the achievements of medicine already allow such women to give birth, they still do not know what to do with the baby, they are afraid of it, give it to their grandmothers and run off to work. To the theater, to school or to business. And they begin to enjoy the child only when he grows up and it becomes possible to establish an emotional connection with him.
The innate fear of death and the desire to protect themselves from it allowed skin-visual women to learn how to establish emotional connections with people and develop incredible sensuality. It was from them that the whole world learned what love is.
But the properties of the visual vector are not always realized, and then the state of fear of death does not go away. It can manifest itself in a variety of ways: fear of the dark, belief in omens, superstitions, phobias and panic attacks, hysterics - including fear of pregnancy and childbirth.
When a woman understands her mental properties, recognizes her destiny and begins to realize it, fears go away, and joy and enjoyment of life comes.
What more do you want? - Emotions and meaning
The female psyche is rapidly evolving, the desires of women increase along with the opportunity for their realization. Women do not want to yield to men in social life, they master male professions and traditionally male areas of activity, strive for equality. Internal conflict arises due to the fact that the nature of a man and a woman and the realization of the male and female psyche are still different. Understanding of these differences is given in the training "System-vector psychology".
If a woman has both a sound and a visual vector, then she needs meaning, emotions, and love. A woman still needs protection from a man and should be desirable for her man. For a woman with sound and visual vectors, emotional connection and kinship of souls are of particular importance in the family. Realization of the properties of the sound vector allows you to sensually feel the meaning of life - often this radically changes the attitude towards motherhood, and the implementation of the properties of the visual vector removes all fears.
And to give birth or not to give birth - they both decide.
You can understand yourself, get rid of internal contradictions at the training "System-vector psychology" by Yuri Burlan. Already at the introductory free online lectures, you will receive many answers to your questions.
