Why is the child everywhere and all the "poop". Secrets of uncivilized vocabulary
There are special children for whom the "pot" topic can become a problem in life. For such children, the harmless words "poop" or "priest" can in adulthood develop into much more sophisticated expressions related to dirty toilet vocabulary. And these expressions will testify to deep inner problems that prevent a person from living normally.
At about the age of 4, for no reason at all, a child begins to use the very words that in a cultured society are considered, say, not very pleasant to the ear. We say: "Oh, he caught it in the kindergarten!" or on the playground, or somewhere else among the children. We blame all sorts of circumstances and places - "breeding grounds" of disease, germs, ugly behavior and, of course, uncivilized words. After all, in our family it is not accepted to behave like that.
"Uuuu, look, the poop flew!"
"Hurray, now we will see poop!"
"Look, look, the turd comes out!"
Friendly laughter of children.
It's not funny. It is very sad. It’s sad when a completely furious mother shouts to her little child: “I’m giving you lips now! Well, shut your mouth, quickly, whoever you told him to!”, Then tugs at his hand and rudely drags him along so that he feels more guilty, so that he understands his unforgivable behavior.
Non-cultural words - a norm or a pathology?
The fact is that there is nothing terrible or reprehensible in the use of such words by children at the age of 4-6 years. They really expand their vocabulary, mainly among their peers, and exchange new words. This is the next stage in their knowledge of the world. Children learn about the existence of different parts of the body and, since they are not yet limited by cultural boundaries, they immediately bring their interest out.
Of course, children cannot be punished for this. It is necessary to softly and calmly explain that it is impossible to speak like that in public. This is how the cultural framework and skills of behavior in society are instilled in the little man.
However, there is one point that needs attention. There are special children for whom the "pot" topic can become a problem in life. For such children, the harmless words "poop" or "priest" can in adulthood develop into much more sophisticated expressions related to dirty toilet vocabulary. And these expressions will testify to deep inner problems that prevent a person from living normally.
The harsh "toilet" words used in adulthood are associated with a particularly sensitive anal area of the body. System-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan says that the features of this zone, namely the compression and unclenching of the sphincter, its tension and relaxation, affect the formation of the human psyche with the anal vector. Let's see how this happens.
Mom, it hurts
One day, mom notices that the child is postponing going to the toilet. Then it starts to repeat itself regularly. It becomes scary for him to begin the process of cleansing, because he has already felt the first lingering pain due to stool retention and knows how difficult it is in such cases to start emptying the intestines. This is not pain from a bruised knee, which quickly passes and leaves no trace, but something deeper, some kind of vague heavy sensation that causes anxiety. What if it's forever? And he resignedly declares: "I will not poop!"
Mom frantically begins to look for ways to solve the problem when she realizes that the second day is coming to an end, and the child has not yet gone to the toilet. Persuasion, intimidation and threats are used. After all, you need to convey to the kid that it is necessary to go to the toilet, and if he does not urgently do this now, it will be "oh-oh-very bad." Then enemas, suppositories and various medications are taken into service. Parents begin to treat the consequence, but they hardly think about the underlying causes of the problem.
As a rule, everything is limited to strenuous attempts to remember what the child ate the day before or what he put in his mouth on the playground. Yes, of course, there is also an intestinal infection, but if it occurs with some frequency and becomes habitual, then you should start sounding the alarm.
Where do legs grow from … a problem
People with an anal vector are characterized as very solid, loving to delve into details, to finish any business to a brilliant conclusion, striving to be the best in everything. Praise and support are very important to them.
As soon as the child receives the first skills in serving his needs, the mother begins to believe that he has already grown up. "How?! You still can't put on the T-shirt correctly ?! Haven't you brushed your teeth yet ?! Well, faster, as long as you can sit in the toilet! What other toy do you need there? Enough already, everyone, let's go, I said!"
As a rule, a small owner of the anal vector does not walk fast, gets a little tired, slowly puts on his shoes … oh-h-e-n-m-e-d-l-e-n-n-o … And, as a rule, mom, especially with the cutaneous vector, living in a different rhythm, it is annoying. “Well, what a brake are you! Faster, faster, let's run faster! " The skin mother begins to twitch, get irritated, and the child simultaneously falls into a stupor and does not understand how to fasten these unfortunate shoes.
Fuss, haste and the demand to do something quickly drives such a kid into a state where he cannot cope with all the demands that have piled on him, is unable to navigate the number of tasks coming from an adult, and begins to respond to all this with clamps in the body.
He cannot normally go to the toilet, and in adulthood he will no longer be able to start any business, postponing it in the same way as the act of defecation, not being able to complete it in a timely manner and with high quality.
The pot is important
The act of cleansing is the most important process taking place in the body, especially for a person with an anal vector, but somehow it is not customary to publicly discuss this issue of a purely personal nature. Everything related to the forbidden area is accompanied by shame, awkwardness, especially among people with an anal vector, who are afraid to embarrass themselves, striving to "not hit their faces in the mud."
A dermal mother requires her child to adapt to her fast rhythm, wants to emphasize her position, to prove to herself and others that she is successful in everything. She must arrive on time, must do everything, must be the first among others. The child, on the other hand, needs to receive a sense of security from her, which, in particular, is expressed in understanding his characteristics.
A kid with an anal vector, sitting on a potty, learns the skill of a high-quality completion of the process begun, learns to be clean. This is how his psyche gets pleasure. He wants to complete the work he has begun, reaching the ideal, completing it in the best possible way.
When he is torn from the pot, rushed, crushed with authority, this prevents the child from finishing what he started. He does not feel "clean". And since a person with an anal vector thinks in the categories "clean-dirty", then "dirty" begins to prevail. "Dirty" words, toilet vocabulary are the lot of the owners of the anal vector, who in childhood were not allowed to complete the most important thing for them - bowel cleansing. And also those who are in frustrations, who are not satisfied with life.
Who can help such a child while he is growing up? And how exactly can this be done?
The over-effect from the awareness of the properties of one's own and of the child
The super-effect of Yuri Burlan's training in system-vector psychology is that the mother begins to fully understand her child. Accept its natural features and respond appropriately to them. Do not get annoyed, but tune in to the desired rhythm. It sometimes even begins to seem to others that she has the ability to magically stretch the time so as not to be late for kindergarten, for classes and not get stuck in traffic jams.
The mother herself notices that she began to have time to rejoice with her child in a beautifully and neatly painted picture, an even bed, a clean room and toys carefully placed on the shelves. She feels happy observing simple things that she simply did not notice before.
Her inner world is filled with calmness and satisfaction, and her financial problems, shortages from her own unfulfillment or from the absence of a man in her life, do not bring pain to either her or her child, and she does not feel the need to take them out on the little man. Simply because they leave her life forever.
And the child no longer has health problems, the properties of his psyche develop in their own rhythm, correctly and on time. And the "ugly" words picked up somewhere fly by at the speed of migratory birds, without lingering or leaving an unwanted trace in the psychic world hidden from us.
At the training on system-vector psychology by Yuri Burlan, everyone can touch what is hidden in the soul, reveal and learn to embody their real desires. Recognizing them in ourselves, we also become able to see and feel the other, to find a common language and understanding with him, and therefore, to live a full, happy life. Those mothers who have been trained and found an approach to their unhurried baby were convinced of this. Here are their reviews:
Register for free online lectures on systemic vector psychology by Yuri Burlan here.